We Drove All the Way to Stanley for This?

“Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. But that’s okay. The journey changes you.” -Anthony Bourdain

As summer quickly approaches, I can already feel the anticipation building — camping trips, family adventures overseas, long lazy summer days just waiting to be lived. I’m honestly buzzing with excitement thinking about everything we have planned. In just a few short weeks, we’ll be gallivanting across the Atlantic on a multi-week, multi-country adventure through Europe. Oh golly… it’s going to be amaze, amaze, amaze (any Project Hail Mary fans? 😉).

But alongside all that excitement, I also find myself thinking about the logistics. The stress. The inevitable headaches. The meltdowns. Because as much as I LOVE travel and adventure, I know by now it’s never all sunshine and rainbows.

And funny enough, that exact phrase — sunshine and rainbows — brings me back to a camping trip last September in Stanley. During that trip, I experienced one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen: a fog rainbow, something I didn’t even know existed. Yet in that very same weekend, I also experienced plenty of frustrations, disappointments, and moments where things absolutely did not go according to plan. The midlife squeeze as they call it was at an all time high that weekend. 

Travel, like life, tends to hold both at the same time.

And since many of you are probably gearing up for your own summer adventures, I thought I’d share a few lessons I learned last year in the hopes they help your travels (and mine)— and maybe our expectations — go a little smoother.

When Adventure Begins with Frustration

Okay, so Stanley is about three hours from McCall, and we usually make it out there two or three times a year. If you’ve never been, I want you to immediately stop reading this newsletter, pull out your calendar, and find a 2–3 day window to get your booty out there. It is MAGNIFICENT.

Seriously. I’ve traveled to some pretty incredible places around the world (and still have so many more on my list), but Stanley is one of those places that just grabs you. If you love raw beauty, jagged mountains, alpine lakes, rivers, trails, hot springs, starry skies… it’s pretty freaking awesome. Now, if you’re more of a city-travel kind of person, maybe it won’t hit quite the same. Then again, I still think you’d be blown away by it, so honestly… go anyway.

Now, onto the chaos. 😄

Our plan was to hit the road as soon as the kids got out of school at 3 PM so we could make it to Stanley with enough time to grab dinner and set up camp in daylight.

Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Why do I always believe we’re magically going to leave town on time for trips? To be fair, this one wasn’t entirely our fault. Work had me glued to my computer until 5 PM. Most days I have flexibility, but not this time. I had to officially finish the workday before starting a drive where most of the route has zero cell service.

Which brings me to:

Lesson #1: Everything takes longer than you think it will on travel days. Plan accordingly.

Also, stealing some wisdom from Greg McKeown: when estimating how long something will take in life… multiply it by 1.5. If you think the drive to school to pickup your kids will take 10 minutes, give yourself 15 minutes. If you think that work project will take 1 hour, give yourself 1.5 hours. You get it. 

Humans are notoriously bad at estimating time. And apparently, I am especially human when it comes to road trips. 😄

The Slow Unraveling of the Itinerary

So, we got a late start. No big deal, right? We’d just cruise a little faster and make up some time.

Wrong again. 😄 About 30 minutes into the drive, we heard it from the backseat:

“I’m hungry.”

Jeepers, kids, can we at least make it past Cascade first?! Unfortunately, we quickly realized that once you leave Cascade, food options get pretty slim. Yes, we had dinner packed in the camper… but the camper was absolutely stuffed with bikes, gear, and chaos, and the thought of unloading everything on the side of the highway sounded miserable.

So we stopped for food, in Cascade. Thirty minutes from our house. Not only another delay but also frustrating that we didn’t just eat at home. This actually happens to us all the time where we think we’ll leave faster than we do and then when we finally hit the road we realize it’s mealtime and all our food is packed away. 

Lesson #2: Always have an easy backup dinner plan for road trips.

Even if you don’t think you’ll need it that night, trust me — you’ll eat it at some point.

A few of our favorite easy road meals:

  • premade salads 
  • burger in a bowl – yum! 
  • sandwiches
  • yogurt bowls

Simple. Fast. Minimal cleanup. Minimal hanger-induced family drama. 😄

Elk Symphonies as a Consolation Prize

Okay, kids are fed. Work is done. Time to finally get ourselves to Stanley.

Now, in true Idaho camping fashion, we hadn’t booked a campsite ahead of time. We figured with it being the off-season, we’d still be able to snag a spot around Redfish Lake or one of our usual favorite campgrounds. Because of that plan, I had also mapped out my Saturday morning hike assuming Tony and the kids would still be sleeping at camp in the camper while I snuck out for an early adventure.

Well… because of all our delays, we didn’t make it to Redfish that night. Instead, about 15 minutes before Stanley, we pulled into an area we knew would definitely have dispersed camping available and decided we’d regroup in the morning and try to find a Redfish campsite in daylight instead.

The problem was, we were only in Stanley for two days, so that Saturday morning hike felt very important to me. I wanted to make the most of the time, the drive, the effort of getting there. So when I woke up at 6 AM to find my exhausted family still fast asleep — and realized I was stuck because the truck was hooked up to the camper — I was cranky. Real cranky.

I reluctantly decided to just wander up the dirt road behind camp so I could at least move my body and get outside. Honestly, I was mostly doing it for the dogs at that point. 

But you guys… this ended up becoming one of the coolest and most unexpected sunrise outings I’ve ever had.

The pups and I slowly drifted off the road and started climbing higher in search of Sawtooth views. The morning was crisp, foggy, and quiet, and I hoped that if we gained enough elevation, maybe we’d break out above the clouds to see some Sawtooth mountain peaks.

Then I heard it.

The loud, unmistakable bugle of elk echoing through the trees.

The dogs’ ears shot straight up. Ember’s inner wolf (all 1% of her 😊) suddenly became very interested in the sounds coming from the woods. I kept the dogs close — thank you, e-collars — and we kept moving upward through the fog. And honestly… I started to get why hunters love the pursuit as much as the outcome. There was something magical about slowly moving through the misty forest while those bugles kept calling from farther ahead. The whole thing felt wild and ancient and alive.

Eventually, we gained enough elevation to catch glimpses of the Sawtooth Range as the clouds briefly parted. Thank youuuuu.

We dipped back into the trees and started heading toward another little knoll on the map that looked even higher as I figured maybe the views would get even better. But then we rounded a bend and less than fifty feet away, the forest suddenly opened into a clearing… and there they were.

A full herd of elk.

Completely majestic. Completely unaware of us.

It was one of those moments that makes the whole world go still for a second.

And honestly? Even though it wasn’t the epic 360-degree Sawtooth sunrise I had originally planned, it somehow felt even more special — because it was unexpected. Rare. Quiet. Entirely ours.  

Which brings me to:

Lesson #3: Have a backup plan for your ideal plan… but sometimes, don’t have a plan at all. Just go and see where the morning takes you. But GO. Don’t throw in the towel since it wasn’t your ideal plan. 

Below is a short video of it. I was recording while walking because I was hoping to capture the sound of the bugles to show the kids, but surprise! I captured the elk instead. Excuse my language when I was surprised.😂

Magical Fog Rainbow

Feeling satisfied that I had at least salvaged the morning with a cool little adventure, I started heading back toward camp — hopeful that maybe my family was awake by now and possibly even making me breakfast because I had definitely worked up an appetite.

But before I got back, I noticed this small knoll directly above our campsite had cleared of fog. I figured I’d climb up real quick to see if there were any Sawtooth views from up there that might convince the family to hike back up with me later.

And that’s when it happened. By following my gut and pushing my legs up one more short climb, I turned around and saw something I had never seen in my entire life.

Hanging faintly in the sky was a white rainbow.

At first, I honestly questioned if I was just seeing the fog weirdly. But the longer I stared, and the more photos I took (which were many 😄), the more certain I became — this was absolutely some sort of magical ghost rainbow floating in the clouds.

I just stood there staring at it with chills.

It felt surreal. Quiet. Sacred almost.

And I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Gina (my mother-in-law who had passed away a few months earlier) was sending a little good morning hello to me and her puppy dog Harry from up above.

A few days later back at home, I googled it and discovered it’s actually a real phenomenon called a fogbow — also known as a white rainbow, mistbow, cloudbow, or ghost rainbow.

Have you ever seen one before? Can you see it in the photo above?

I hope someday you get to experience one too.

I almost wish I had realized how rare they were in the moment because I probably would have sprinted back to camp and dragged my sleepy family up that hill to see it. 😄

Which brings me to:

Lesson #4: You don’t always have to chase the beauty you already know and love. Sometimes life has entirely different kinds of beauty waiting for you — the kind you never even knew existed. Be open to this and keep an eye out for the unique surprises around the corner (like those elk) or behind you. 

And maybe more importantly: if you feel pulled toward something… listen to it. Your gut often knows where the magic is hiding. I’m so glad I followed my gut to hike to the top of that knoll. 

Know Your Party

So far, a lot of this trip had honestly been a bit of a shitshow — excuse my language 😄. It felt like one thing after another was challenging us and testing our patience, and truthfully, I haven’t even shared all of it yet. And I kept wondering if we should have saved our time and energy and just spent the weekend at home. But then, every once in a while, something magical happens that suddenly makes the whole messy adventure feel worth it. Like the elk. Or the fog rainbow. 

So we got loaded up and headed to Redfish Lake where we snagged a site, set up camp, ate lunch, and got ready to head out on a hike. I personally was eager to do a new trail in the area, but I also knew I needed to play to my audience and their abilities. Our crew included my parents, who were 75 at the time, and my kiddos, who were 5 and 7 and… not exactly the tiny mountain goats I had hoped they’d become by that age 😄.

I found one of the only shorter hikes in the area we hadn’t done yet — around 2.2 miles — and felt pretty excited about a new destination. So off we went!

Well… within the first quarter mile, we had already climbed over five downed trees. The kids thought it was AWESOME. Basically an obstacle course adventure. My parents? Not quite as thrilled. 😄 To be fair, they’re both impressively active and fit, but crawling over giant logs with pokey branches everywhere just wasn’t their ideal afternoon stroll.

Then we reached a small creek crossing where your options were either wet feet or carefully balancing across a skinny log. My mom gave it a valiant effort but crossing logs over a creek isn’t really her jam (see what I did there??). While watching her try to safely navigate the crossing, I realized I needed to make the call I didn’t want to make. 

We had to turn around. If we were struggling less than half a mile into the hike already, this simply wasn’t the right trail for our group. So we bailed and pivoted. 

Lesson #5: Know your party. Know the abilities, comfort levels, energy, and limits of the people you’re adventuring with — and know when it’s time to call it and pivot. Not every trip is about maximizing mileage or conquering the hardest route. Sometimes the win is simply having everyone enjoy the experience safely and happily. 

And one more thing: when you travel or adventure with a group, you may have to sacrifice some of what you most want to do in order to support the group dynamic. That’s not necessarily bad — but it’s important to recognize before you commit to the trip.

Tantrums and Travels

We pivoted to another hike that was just up the road that I had done a handful of times. So, off we went to the next trailhead, but somehow in that short drive, my 5-year-old son Jackson went from totally fine to complete emotional catastrophe. 😄 I mean… this was a BIG one. Big feelings, big screams, full-body rageeeee. Honestly, I don’t even remember what sparked it, but wow, that kid can absolutely melt into a puddle of pure emotion when he’s overwhelmed.

We pulled into the parking lot and he was still losing it so the rest of the family got out of the car and then was awkwardly standing outside waiting for us because they didn’t want to get too far ahead on the hike without us. I’m pretty sure another parent walked by and gave me that look, you know the parent look that says the “I’ve been there, hang in there, you’re doing good mom” look. 

Jeepers. This day just kept throwing curveballs.

But slowly — very slowly — we worked our way through it. We talked. We calmed down. We got some food into his apparently empty stomach, which honestly may have been 90% of the issue 😄.

And eventually, we came out the other side.

Which brings me to:

Lesson #6: Kids and travel are amazing… but kids and travel can also equal BIG emotions.

We especially learned this during our Mexico trip in March when Jackson struggled quite a bit emotionally. I realized that for him, traveling somewhere new and unfamiliar feels exciting and overwhelming all at once, more so than our daughter who rolls with the changes way easier.

For Jackson though, new places, different routines, less sleep, unfamiliar food, long days, overstimulation — it’s a lot for little nervous systems. The food is a big one for him too. 

Recently, I came across some tips from a world-traveling family that really resonated with me and that I had wished we did before our Mexico trip, so sharing with you in case it helps you plan and prepare: 

  • Do a family prep night where you order the food you’ll be eating in that country and share what the trip will be like. Get the kids excited and work through nerves and anxiety with them now. 
  • Practice some sayings in their language. Ask Chatgpt for 10 phrases kids would use. 
  • Hide their favorite toy 2-3 weeks before the trip and surprise them with it when en route.
  • Remind them the trip is for everyone, you’ll do things they love and then other things they might not like, it’s a family trip. 
  • Build in some “run wild time” between museum viewing and other activities. Find a park, a pool, let them get their ya yas out. 
  • Get podcasts, books, stories for the location that are age appropriate for the kiddos. 
  • Have multiple maps so the kids can be apart of leading and knowing where you’re going. 
  • Create a good maps with things pinned so in a pinch you can find worthy restaurants, bathrooms, parks, etc. that are nearby. This would have been HUGE in Mexico. I had my list of places we wanted to eat at, but sometimes the hunger would strike when we were nowhere near those spots and we floundered trying to find something worth spending our money on that was close by. 
  • Decide on a small amount of money you’ll give them daily for souvenirs. Each day they need to earn their money by showing their good behavior throughout the day. Make sure you set these expectations that are appropriate for their age ahead of time (standing in line- play I spy, sitting at restaurants-draw pictures of what they saw that day, handling “new” food or things- taste everything and free to spit it out, etc.). Allow them to use the money how they want and allow them to earn partial sums. One tantrum in the afternoon doesn’t mean they lose all of it. 
  • Snacks, snacks, snacks. Enough said. 

Midlife Squeeze

Okay, kiddos were happy again, parents were ready, the dogs and I were eager, and we were finally off.

As we hiked up the trail, my mom and I naturally took the lead, Tony and the now very cheerful kids stayed somewhere in the middle, and my 75-year-old dad brought up the rear at what he lovingly described as a “putzing” pace 😄.

As we continued along, I kept floating between the different groups — checking on everyone, making sure people had water, snacks, decent morale, all the things. And somewhere during all that back-and-forth, it really hit me:

This is the season of life we’re in now.

The season of bouncing between caring for children who still need you and parents who are beginning to need you in different ways too.

We had just spent the previous year and a half helping care for Tony’s mom, Gina, while battling stage four cancer. Thankfully, my parents are healthy and very independent right now, but even something as simple as helping them over downed logs or watching my dad slowly work his way up the trail made me pause and reflect on this unique and sometimes exhausting chapter of life.

It’s actually called the midlife squeeze.

And if you Google it, the internet describes it as the period in middle age when people are simultaneously caring for children, aging parents, careers, homes, finances, relationships, and basically everyone else… often while quietly neglecting themselves in the process.

And wow… does that feel accurate.

My girlfriends and I talk about this stage of life all the time. We thought once the kids were finally in school we’d somehow “made it” to an easier phase. But instead, many of us found ourselves shifting directly into caring for aging parents, too.

Again, my parents are wonderfully self-sufficient (minus the occasional log crossing 😄), but after walking through Gina’s cancer journey with our family, I can confidently say:

The midlife squeeze is real.

It’s beautiful in many ways. There’s so much meaning in being there for the people you love. But it’s also exhausting. Emotional. Intense. There are demands coming from every direction — kids, careers, homes, marriage, friendships, aging parents, finances, schedules, all of it.

It really is a squeeze.

Lesson #7: If you’re traveling with family this summer, realize you may be navigating multiple generations, multiple energy levels, and multiple emotional needs all at once. Give yourself grace. Lower expectations where needed. Slow the pace when necessary. And remember that sometimes the goal isn’t perfection — it’s simply being together.

Oh and a big lesson too, TAKE CARE OF YOU. You must be healthy and sane to care for them, so if you let the needs of you go, you won’t be able to help them. It’s not selfish to say no. It’s not selfish to say, “sorry kids, mommy needs to get a workout in right now.” It’s not selfish to say to your family on a summer trip, “sorry guys, I need some alone time for an hour, I’ll skip this activity and see you when you’re back.” It teaches your kids valuable life lessons and helps set the day and trip up for success so you feel less frazzled. And when you’re back at home it’s not selfish to tell your family you can’t do Sunday dinner this week, or that you have to skip your nephews birthday party this time if you really need a moment for yourself and all of your important demands. Even on vacation too, make room for what you know you need to be the best you. 

If you need help saying NO to things, check out the previous Elevate Livin’ Life e-newsletter. 

Together was the Win

Well, in case you’re wondering, we did make it to the lake. It was beautiful. No one fell or got hurt. Everyone still liked each other both at the top of the hike and at the bottom, which honestly feels like a parenting win sometimes 😄.

And yes, a small part of me was disappointed that we had driven all the way to Stanley only for me to repeat a hike I’d already done multiple times instead of chasing some new epic adventure. But the more I reflect on that weekend, the more I realize it was never really supposed to be about conquering some huge hike.

It was about being with my family.

Someday my parents won’t be here anymore. Someday my kids will be off building lives of their own. And when that season comes, I’ll still be able to come back to Stanley and hike the bigger peaks and farther lakes and move at whatever pace I want.

Heck, I could even come back later this year or next year and do those hikes.

But that weekend? That weekend was about togetherness more than accomplishment.

Which brings me to:

Lesson #8: Pick destinations that still feel magical even with low effort.

One of the reasons I love Stanley so much is that the beauty starts the second you arrive. I don’t have to summit a mountain or complete some massive adventure to feel filled up there. The drive alone delivers jaw-dropping views. Sitting by Redfish Lake feels special.

So when you’re planning summer adventures, think about this: what places give you the most bang for your buck? Where is the baseline experience already amazing, even if the plans shift, the weather changes, the kids melt down, or the big hike doesn’t happen?

Because sometimes the best trips aren’t the ones where everything goes perfectly.

Sometimes they’re the ones where you simply got to be there together.

I’ve been working really hard the past few months trying to make sure our big European adventure turns out amazing. We’ll be spending a week traveling with 14 people ranging in age from 6 to 76 😄, so figuring out how to make the trip enjoyable for all the different personalities, energy levels, and interests has definitely been both a challenge and a fun puzzle to solve.

And honestly, I kind of love that part of travel too.

If you want any tips on planning an epic trip — or if you want to hear more about what we specifically have planned for Europe (Germany, the Italian Dolomites, Slovenia, and Austria) — hit me up! I’m always happy to share ideas, lessons learned, and favorite spots.

I hope this month’s Elevate Livin’ Life newsletter gave you a few chuckles, helped you feel less alone if you’re navigating the midlife squeeze right now, or maybe just offered a few helpful reminders as you head into your own summer adventures.

And as always… I LOVE hearing where people are traveling because it immediately adds more places to my ever-growing bucket list 😄.

So tell me — what trip or adventure are you looking forward to most this year?

And if you’re headed to any of these places, reach out! I’ve got lots of recommendations and insights:

  • Yellowstone National Park & Grand Teton National Park (especially if you want good moose and WOLF spotting intel 👀)
  • Maui
  • Baja California Peninsula
  • Colorado
  • Whistler 
  • Stanley & the Sawtooth Range  
  • North Cascades National Park
  • And of course, McCall and the surrounding central Idaho mountains.

The last Lesson I want to leave you with though, is this most important one: 

Lesson #9: Take the Trip. Yes there will be challenges, frustrations, a ton of energy, money, let downs, and so many negative sides to it. But ultimately, it will be so worth it in the end. 

Happy adventuring, friends. I can’t wait to see your photos and hear your stories.

— Kelli

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
Learning new tricks from bikers way more skilled than me! Haven’t pushed my comfort zone in a while and it felt good. 

What Do You Actually Want?

That quiet voice inside you might be pointing you exactly where you’re meant to go.

“The life you’re meant to live is usually hiding inside what you keep brushing off.” -Unknown

You guys… I did it.

I just made 10-year-old Kelli (and 39-year-old Kelli) so proud. I officially earned my first paycheck from my dream job — writing and photography. And I am just so giddy about it. Like, truly… wow.

Ever since I was little — dressing my animals up in my clothes and photographing them in front of a bedsheet (I mean… an elegant, very professional backdrop 😄)-see below photos for proof — I dreamed of traveling the world, taking photos, writing about it, and getting paid to do it.

It may be a decade or two later than I originally imagined, and it wasn’t exactly travel writing (it was interviewing locals in town like the cat ski groomer pictured above)… but I finally did it. I made money doing something I’ve always quietly wondered if I ever could.

And maybe the coolest part? I was brave enough, over the past few years, to actually say it out loud — that this was still a dream of mine. To believe that it’s not too late to start something. Especially the things that feel tucked deep inside you, just waiting to be brought to life.

So why am I sharing this with you?

Because I believe there are more of us out there who have something inside us — a voice, a talent, a passion, a pull, a knack. A quiet something that keeps whispering, don’t forget about me. Don’t forget about this dream that deserves a chance to exist in the world. You’re meant to share it. Not just for you… but for the people it might impact.

Recently, I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts, The Mel Robbins Podcast, and Mel Robbins had Hoda Kotb on. They were talking about reinventing yourself at any age — and one story Hoda shared completely stopped me.

She said she had always wanted kids. But life kept getting in the way — building her career, then breast cancer, then a divorce. And eventually, she told herself she had simply gotten too old to have children on her own. So she quietly let the dream go. Not because she stopped wanting it… but because she didn’t think it was possible.

And because of that, she never said it out loud. Not to others. Not even to herself. It hurt too much to admit how badly she wanted something she believed she couldn’t have.

Then one day, she went to a baby shower with a friend. Afterward, her friend casually said something like, “That was fun — even though we’re the kind of women who chose not to have kids.”

And it stopped Hoda in her tracks.

That wasn’t true. She hadn’t chosen that. But she had let the world believe it — because it felt easier than speaking her truth.

Later that day, she was home watching TV when a story came on about Sandra Bullock adopting a baby. Hoda immediately grabbed her phone, looked up Sandra Bullock’s age… and realized they were the exact same age.

There it was. Proof.

Proof that maybe it wasn’t too late.

Listening to her tell that story gave me chills. Because once she allowed herself to say it out loud — once she admitted what she truly wanted — everything shifted. And today, she has two beautiful children and a life she once thought wasn’t possible.

That conversation with Mel and Hoda kept circling back to one simple, powerful truth: you have to be brave enough to admit what you want. You have to let yourself want it. And then… be willing to figure out a way forward.

So, my friend — I’ll ask you the same question:

What is inside you that wants to come to life?

What Do You WANT… Not What Do You Need

Yesterday, I was out on a run listening to 10x Is Easier Than 2x and, if I’m being honest, I was kind of half listening… letting it play in the background while my mind wandered. But then something pulled me back in. The author started talking about wanting versus needing — and I actually laughed out loud.

Because this is a conversation we have in our house all the time with the kids.
“Do you really need that… or do you just want it?”

I felt very validated in my parenting for a solid 10 seconds. 😄

And then… he flipped it.

According to him, we’ve kind of had it backwards. Instead of downplaying our wants and prioritizing our needs, he suggests we actually do the opposite — that we pay attention to what we want and shine a light on it.

A few ideas from the book that really stuck with me:

• “Need” comes from pressure. “Want” comes from purpose.
• When your goals come from need, they feel heavy — like obligations. When they come from want, they feel energizing — like opportunities.
• “I need this to work” puts you in survival mode. “I want this to work” puts you in creative mode.

And one line that really made me pause:

You don’t need to justify your desires to anyone.
If someone asks why you want something… it’s enough to simply say — because I want it.

Whew. That one hits.

So much of life is filled with people (and systems) nudging us toward what we should need — the secure job, the steady paycheck, the safe path. And while those things can matter, sometimes they also create a false sense of security… keeping us operating from scarcity instead of abundance.

Wanting, on the other hand? That’s where expansion lives.

So let me ask you again — what is inside you that you want to come true?

Not what you think you should want.
Not what feels practical or responsible.
But what quietly keeps showing up in the back of your mind?

The what-ifs.
The someday-maybes.

The author shares that over 25 years ago, when he hit a rock bottom — divorced and bankrupt on the same day — he started a simple journaling practice: asking himself daily, What do I want?

Maybe that’s a place to start.

At the end of the day, the week, the month — just write it down. No filtering. No justifying. Just… wanting.

Because remember:

Your biggest breakthroughs don’t come from chasing what you need.
They come from having the courage to pursue what you truly want.

What’s Holding You Back?

Here are some common themes that hold people back from even considering their dreams, goals, and desires quietly living inside them:

Too Much Work:
A long time ago, I was floundering in my career path. Tony was in PT school in New Hampshire, and I was bouncing around between odd jobs because we knew we’d be moving soon. But if I’m being honest, I was also living in a world of need.

I wanted to be a writer and photographer… but I had no idea how to actually make money doing that. So instead of chasing what I wanted, I chased what I thought I needed — the potential for financial success somewhere else.

At the time, my mom was living in Boise, and a newer company, Scentsy, was taking off. She joined as a rep, and my dad quickly realized it hadn’t made its way to New Hampshire yet… so he signed me up too. 😄 For a few years, my mom and I were all in on the direct sales world, and honestly, at times, we did pretty well.

But I remember something so clearly. My mom once said she didn’t actually want to be super successful at it.

I was like — WHAT?? Why not? Isn’t that the whole point?!

Ahh, to be young, ambitious, and slightly confused. 😄

What I didn’t understand then — and deeply understand now — is that she didn’t want the level of work that came with that level of success. Financially, they were okay. She valued her time more than chasing more money.

And now… I get it. Time is incredibly valuable. But that’s a conversation for another day.

The point for today is this: if you’re feeling like my mom — like following that persistent want inside you might require too much work — don’t let that stop you before you even begin.

Yes, there may be a season of a lot of work. But over time, you can build, grow, and eventually leverage that work. You can create something that not only changes your life — financially and with more freedom — but also creates opportunities for others.

And here’s the other piece: when you’re doing something you truly want, it often doesn’t feel like work in the same way.

Right now, when I get the opportunity to do paid writing, even if it’s not the most glamorous assignment, it still feels exciting. I don’t resent the extra work on my plate because I’m operating from a place of creativity, purpose, and want — not pressure.

Yes, I’ve added more to my plate this year. But it feels different.

And if it ever starts to feel heavy? That’s my signal to adjust and start leveraging.

Failure:
I think a lot of people don’t speak up about what they truly want because they’re afraid of failing.

And yeah… failing is hard.

That Scentsy business my mom and I built? It didn’t last. It worked for a while, but not to the level we (okay, mostly my dad and I 😄) had hoped. In the end, we spent more money trying to grow it than we made.

And sure, I can look back and think — that was a waste of time and how embarrassing we failed, I can also think about the what if I had just gone all-in on travel writing instead?

But here’s the thing: I don’t regret it.

Not even a little.

Because what came out of that experience was so much more than money. I gained incredible memories with my mom — traveling around the country, hosting parties, working fall craft fairs in New Hampshire, going on trips, and building something together. I learned lessons I still carry with me today.

So was it a failure?

Not really.

It just didn’t turn out the way we expected. And that’s okay.

Also, if I regret anything from that time, it’s that I didn’t dabble a little in building the photography and writing business on the side while doing Scentsy. So, I’m taking that lesson with me today and building out this side passion project I’ve always dreamed about. 

Limiting Beliefs:
Maybe, like Hoda, you have a little voice (or maybe a loud one) telling you that what you want just isn’t possible.

That’s normal. And there’s actually a reason for it.

Your brain isn’t designed to help you chase your dreams — it’s designed to keep you alive.

It scans for risk. It focuses on what could go wrong. It prefers what’s familiar and predictable. And it often confuses discomfort with danger.

So when you think about starting something new, going after a dream, or stepping outside your comfort zone, your brain jumps in with:

“What if it doesn’t work?”
“That sounds hard.”
“Let’s not.”

Not because you can’t do it… but because it’s doing its job.

So just remember — when your brain gives you ten reasons something might not work, that doesn’t mean it’s right.

It just means you’re stepping into something new.

The Naysayers:
And then there are the external voices.

There will be people — often people who love you — who question your choices. Who try to steer you toward what feels safer, more stable, more “realistic.”

Sometimes they’re projecting their own fears. Sometimes they’re shaped by their own experiences. And sometimes it’s just the culture we’ve all grown up in — one that prioritizes need over want.

I know my own family hesitated when I talked about becoming a travel writer. Not because they didn’t believe in me, but because they knew it wasn’t the easiest path.

And honestly? I hesitated too.

So when you come up against those voices — including your own — and someone asks you why you need that thing…

Try this instead:

“I don’t need it. I want it. And I want it because I want it.”

You don’t need to justify your desires. Let them wrestle with that if they need to. 

Also, don’t be the naysayer.

Be the person who encourages others to go for it. When someone timidly shares an idea or dream, they’re often just testing the waters—seeing if it’s safe to say it out loud. Don’t shut it down. Help build it up.

Because yes, they might fail. But they also might succeed. And even if they don’t, they’ll be better for having tried.

And sometimes, all someone needs is one person who says, “You should go for it.”

And remember this:

Until you go after it, you’ll never actually know what’s possible.

So don’t wait until later in life wondering “what if.”

Test it now. Explore it now. Try.

Be Sandra Bullock

So here’s another reason to go after it — whatever your “it” is.

You need to be the Sandra Bullock.

Not literally, of course 😄… but you need to be the person who chooses to go for it anyway. The one who listens to that quiet pull and decides it’s worth following. Because when you do, it doesn’t just change your life — it ripples out in ways you may never even see.

We need more people willing to chase what lights them up. For a few reasons:

1. It creates more joy — for you and everyone around you.
If more of us were living in alignment with what we actually want — in our work, our hobbies, how we spend our time — I truly believe we’d see more happiness. Less heaviness. Less burnout. Maybe even less of the mental health struggles so many people are facing right now.

Joy is contagious.
At least, I think it is.

When I see someone fully lit up by their life — passionate, excited, in their element — it doesn’t make me feel behind… it makes me feel inspired. It reminds me what’s possible.

2. You never know who you’re going to impact.
Do you think Sandra Bullock knew that by adopting a child later in life — and simply living her truth — she would be the exact spark someone else needed?

Probably not.

Yes, she’s a celebrity, and sure, there’s influence that comes with that. But she didn’t do it for that reason. She did it because it was what she wanted.

And then it reached Hoda Kotb at exactly the right moment.

So the real question is… who are you that person for?

Because you don’t need a platform or fame to inspire someone. Sometimes it’s just one decision. One step. One moment of choosing what you want instead of what feels safe.

And someone, somewhere, is watching… and thinking:

If she can do that… maybe I can too.

Take Action

So today, I want to encourage you to pause and really think about it.

Your childhood dreams.
Your college dreams.
Your “someday maybe” goals.
The little things that whisper, that would be cool to do.

And then ask yourself — why am I not doing that?

You might have a really valid reason. You might realize it truly doesn’t align with where you are right now in life. I can relate to that. I still sometimes wish I had chased travel writing earlier, but part of what held me back wasn’t just fear or money — it was also that, after meeting Tony, I didn’t actually want to go gallivanting around the world alone. I wanted to build a life with him. I wanted family. So in that season, it wasn’t the right fit.

And now? Now that I’ve built a successful business (thank you, Elevate TC Services 🙌), I feel more grounded — and more confident — to start chasing that dream in a different way.

So yes, sometimes it’s okay that now isn’t the time.

But I also want to gently challenge you — is it truly not the time… or is that an easy place to hide?

Because if I’m being honest, I probably could have found a way to do both. It just would have looked different than the version I had in my head. Maybe less hopping on international flights and more weekend adventures closer to home. Maybe slower. Maybe messier. But still possible.

Don’t be afraid to really look at what’s pulling at you and ask — is there a version of this that could exist in my life right now?

So what is it for you?

What keeps nudging you?

Have you always wanted to run a half marathon?
Travel somewhere completely unfamiliar?
Own a horse?
Write a book?
Adopt a child or host a foreign exchange student?

Whatever it is — give yourself space to actually think about it.

Take a 20-minute walk today and let your mind wander there.
Or start a simple daily habit in your journal and ask yourself one question:

What do I want?

And just see what comes up.

Alright friends — thank you for reading along, especially when these Elevate Livin’ Life newsletters get a little long 😉.

So I’ll leave you with this…

Are you brave enough to share what you truly want?

Big or small — I’d genuinely love to hear it.

And I’ll go first:

I want to spend my days adventuring outside, traveling the world, and taking photos and writing about it. And not just because that is so fun to do, but I feel a bigger pull to help inspire others to live their lives to the fullest. I want to see everyone living out their wants.   

There. Said out loud.

Now it’s your turn.

Be brave enough to name it. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You don’t have to know exactly how it will happen. Just start by saying it.

Heck — share it with me. I’ll help you hold it, protect it, and maybe even take a step toward bringing it to life.

Happy Spring! 

–Kelli 

Survey to Elevate Our Lives TOGETHER
Favorite Livin’ Life Activity this Month:
Baja Mexico Adventures with the Family

A Deadly Avalanche Helps Put Life & Death into Perspective

“If we remove all risk, do we also remove the very experiences that make life meaningful?” -Unknown

It’s a brisk, early morning in mid-February, and I’m hugging Tony and three of our friends goodbye in the dark driveway. Jackson — who never wakes up before 8 — is somehow wide-awake, wrapped around his dad like his internal clock knew this wasn’t a normal morning, like he needed to get up realllll early for one last hug. Tony and the group are heading out on a seven-day ski trip to Canada. And yes, I was invited. But ultimately, we decided that as parents, this probably wasn’t the trip for both of us to go on. When the group text started lighting up with packing lists that included harnesses, ski crampons, and ice axes, we quietly pulled the plug on my participation. Tony laughed and said, “We can’t both go to Canada and die on a ski trip — that’s what happens to the parents in Jumanji!” We didn’t actually think anyone was going to die. But I’m sure neither did the mom group in Tahoe who, that very same week Tony left, experienced a devastating avalanche that killed nine members of their group. Suddenly, what had felt adventurous and bold also felt fragile.

If you didn’t see the Tahoe avalanche story, here’s the quick recap (you can read the full CNN article here if you want the details). A tight-knit group of women who had spent years adventuring together set out on a three-day hut trip in the Sierra Nevada. There were 15 people total — four of them professional guides hired to safely lead them through the terrain. On their exit day, Tuesday, February 17th, an avalanche swept down on the group. Nine people were killed (including three of the guides). It’s absolutely heartbreaking. I didn’t know them, but I feel like I did. They’re me. They’re me and my friends. Many were moms with kids on a local ski team. That’s me. Many had avalanche training, experience, and years of practice. That’s me. They were invested in their communities, met up annually for girls’ trips, prioritized adventure and friendship. That’s us. And now many of them are gone. I won’t lie — that week my bestie and I went deep down the rabbit hole trying to understand what happened. She’s a ski guide for an avalanche education company, so this hit her both professionally and personally. I just felt it in my gut. In our ski touring world, when something like this happens, we want to know why — not out of morbid curiosity, but because we want to learn.

And as if that wasn’t enough emotional whiplash, the Olympics were unfolding that same week. The Olympics — where dreams come true… and shatter. Where bodies are pushed to their absolute limits… and sometimes break. As you have probably read about, Lindsey Vonn crashed at speeds nearing 70 mph, her leg breaking in multiple places in a catastrophic fall. As of now, it appears amputation won’t be necessary — but the road ahead will be long and brutal. Watching it all unfold felt like another reminder of how thin the line can be between glory and devastation.

So between the Tahoe avalanche tragedy, the Olympics, Tony leaving for his own trip, and me still chasing powder turns in the backcountry, my brain was busy. Nightmares. Daytime spirals. Questions that wouldn’t let me go quiet:

Is it worth it?

What did those moms think in their final moments — did they regret going?

Where is the line that shouldn’t be crossed, especially as a parent? (Not because parents’ lives are more valuable, but because our responsibility is heavier.)

And for Olympic athletes who risk everything for a shot at gold — when it ends in injury or failure — is it still worth it?

The questions just kept coming. And even if you aren’t into adventuring in the mountains, keep reading because this Elevate Livin’ Life e-newsletter this month should still hit close to home because it will talk all about life and death, risk and comfort, throughout all aspects of our existence.  

Is Life Always Around Us?

Before Tony left, I met up with my bestie to ski some backcountry lines we were ridiculously excited about — because we knew the snow was going to be AMAZING. On the drive to her house, I was listening to The Avalanche Hour, and the host shared about losing friends in an avalanche. Then the guest said she had, too. It struck me how common that story is in the mountain world. So many people have lost someone out there. And then it hit me — I have too. I personally know someone who has died in the mountains in an avalanche in Colorado.

That realization spiraled me a bit. If I know someone, and almost everyone in this industry knows someone… is it just too risky? Is the death rate high enough that this simply isn’t a sport I should be doing?

And then my mind shifted. It brought me back to the most recent loss I’ve experienced — Gina, my mother-in-law, who died from cancer last year. And I realized something sobering: I know far more people who have died from cancer than from backcountry skiing. That perspective stopped me in my tracks. Yes, there is risk in skiing in the backcountry. But there is also risk in not skiing in the backcountry. There is risk every single day of your life — walking out your front door, getting on an airplane, swimming in the ocean, even taking a bite of food. I sadly also have a friend who died choking on a piece of steak at a restaurant, oof.

Death is always around us.

But maybe the better question isn’t whether death is always around us. Maybe the question is — is life all around us?

Life Over Death

Yes, going into the backcountry is inherently riskier than walking out your front door or eating your lunch. I briefly considered looking up the statistics… and then decided I don’t actually want to know. I want to have knowledge. I want experience. I want training. But memorizing death rates? That’s one piece of information I’m okay being naïve about.

It’s like snorkeling in Hawaii — I don’t want to know how many people die from shark attacks. In my mind, it’s zero. Blissful ignorance? Maybe. But it’s intentional. Because despite the risk of dying, going into the mountains — into the backcountry — or really just choosing to adventure at all feels less about death and more about life. About feeling alive.

The joy. The awe. The belly laughs on a skin track. The quiet stillness at the top before you drop in. Those moments are a breath of life I don’t think we’re meant to live without. Yes, you might risk getting hurt. You might even risk dying. But if you never go, you risk something else entirely — the slow fade of not feeling ALIVE.

As one of my favorite quotes says, “Do not fear death, fear the unlived life.” — Tuck Everlasting

I think about those moms in Tahoe. How many trips had they been on before the one that ended their lives? I hope it was a lot. I hope there were years of memories — laughter, inside jokes, summits, powder days, shared snacks, shared fears. Because let’s be honest, with most things in life you get all of it — the joy and the anxiety, the beauty and the risk, the exhilaration and the doubt. But they LIVED. They didn’t stay home because something might happen. They knew the risks. They trained. They hired guides. They mitigated what they could. And sometimes, even when you do everything “right,” you still get unlucky.

Not that it all comes down to luck — avalanche science is layered and complex — but there is an unpredictable element. You can ski in high avalanche danger on steep terrain (not recommended) and come away clean. That’s part of what makes avalanche decision-making so humbling. The days you “get away with it” can blur your perception of risk. But that’s a conversation for another time… maybe over on my McCall outdoors blog.

When reading about the tragedy, one quote from a husband who lost his wife in that Tahoe avalanche stopped me in my tracks: “Caroline spent her final days doing what she loved best, with the people who loved her most, in her favorite place,” Mr. Sekar wrote. “She was with me, her children and our puppy, and then on one last adventure with her sister and close friends, who she now rests with.” Golly, that gives me chills and has me tearing up, what about you? 

Also, in that same article, Sara Boilen — a clinical psychologist and backcountry skier in Montana — said something that feels so true: “We love who we are in the mountains.” 

That’s it, isn’t it?

We choose life in the mountains — even knowing it might someday mean death in the mountains.

What are the things in your life that you might risk it all for? What makes you feel so ALIVE and happy and joyous that it is worth that risk? 

Mitigating Risks

Let me be clear — I don’t want to die in the mountains. And I can guarantee those moms didn’t either. Choosing life in the mountains doesn’t mean being careless about death. It means doing everything in your power to minimize the chances of it. And even if backcountry skiing isn’t your thing, the principle still applies to whatever you do love.

The question isn’t how to eliminate risk — because you can’t. The question is how to manage it.

You learn (hello, avy courses). You practice. You gain experience. You surround yourself with people who know more than you. You check your ego. You constantly challenge yourself to grow wiser, not just braver.

I won’t lie — after going deep down the Tahoe avalanche rabbit hole, my confidence that week was shaken. Even my bestie — who sometimes has a higher risk tolerance than I do — admitted she felt wary after staying up late reading reports (and having avalanche nightmares of her own). But we had waited months for that powder. And no, “we’ve been waiting forever” is not a good reason to go play in dangerous terrain. Powder fever is real — and it clouds judgment.

So we didn’t ski dangerous terrain that day. 

For us, managing risk meant choosing non-avalanche terrain. Low-angle slopes with no connected steeper terrain above. Areas that, based on everything we know about that zone, simply do not slide. Is there still risk? Of course. There is always risk. But we were playing the safer odds.

For extra reassurance, I texted a mentor of mine and asked his opinion. He responded, “I’d go ski that slope alone on a high avy day because of how safe it is. Honestly, the bigger concern is getting hit by a logging truck on the road or your skis colliding with a hidden tree stump under the snow.” 

And wouldn’t you know… my ski did collide with a buried stump that day. Thankfully it caught the bottom of my ski and not my body — but I felt it. Oh AND, a week after he made that comment about the higher risk coming from the chance of being hit by a logging truck, welp, a Sherriff’s vehicle was hit by a logging truck on that same road!!

Risk doesn’t disappear just because you prepare well. It just shifts.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is this: yes, there are risks in almost everything you do in life. But is not going always the better answer? For some people, yes. And that’s okay. But for most of us — especially when we can thoughtfully manage the risk and stack the odds in our favor — I don’t think the answer is to stay home.

Ignoring Loved Ones

Seven years ago, Charlie was one, and I was deep in that brand-new season of motherhood — new baby, new town, new identity. I love my kids fiercely… but I’m not a “sit inside all day with a sleeping baby on my chest” kind of person. They were adorable, yes. But after the fifteenth nap trapped on the couch, I could feel myself unraveling a little.

So I pivoted.

Instead of Charlie sleeping on my chest inside, I strapped her into a backpack and let her sleep while I moved my body outside. Long walks. Trails. Fresh air. I found freedom again. I found joy. I found myself.

And then my dad — who is an outdoorsy, adventure-supporting human — made a comment. “That’s not safe. What if you roll your ankle and can’t hike out with a one-year-old?”

Cue the mom guilt.

What if he’s right?
Am I being reckless?
Am I putting my baby at risk?

Yet underneath all of that fear was a quieter but equally strong voice: But I need this. For my mental health. Please don’t take this away from me.

So I kept going. I mitigated what I could. I always told Tony where I was. Eventually, we got a Garmin so I could call for help if something did happen. I wasn’t ignoring risk — I was managing it.

And the point of this story isn’t to throw my dad under the bus (sorry, Dad — I know you were just being a protective dad… and grandpa). It’s this: sometimes the people who love you most will project their fears onto your choices. And sometimes you have to respectfully hear them… and still listen to your gut.

You know your limits. You know what you need. You know how to mitigate the risks in your own life. Even when the voices around you are loud.

Also, give pause when you are that loud voice. It might be a good call to speak up if you have someone truly being reckless, or it might be a time to bite your tongue and know they’re needing this and playing it as safe as they can. 😉 

Finding Your Limit

That said — we all have limits.

I have family members who don’t love skiing nearly as much as I do, and they probably don’t think it’s worth even slightly risking the backcountry just to ski powder. I get that. Truly. And I have my own limits, too.

I love bagging peaks. I love standing on a summit with 360-degree views, lungs burning, heart pounding, soaking in that earned-it feeling. I love the runner’s high of pushing to the tippy top. But I have zero desire to climb Everest or any other ultra-high, objectively dangerous mountain. Hard pass.

I love skiing powder. But I don’t need to put myself on super steep, consequential terrain just to float on blower snow. That’s not my edge.

Like I mentioned earlier, Tony left for that Canadian ski trip — and the second I heard words like harnesses and ice axes, I knew it wasn’t for me. That doesn’t make it wrong. It’s just not my version of fun. I think it’s awesome for the people who love that type of adventure.

Do I think Tony is going to die? No. I don’t.
Do I think he’s going to be pushed into uncomfortable situations? Absolutely. (Notice I said uncomfortable — not reckless.) He’ll be stretched. He’ll learn. He’ll grow in skill and mental fortitude. And I can’t wait to hear all about it when he gets home.

And I also can’t wait for him to tell me about the zones I will want to ski — the ones that don’t require ropes and crampons. 

Meanwhile, our kids are watching all of this. The conversations about the Canadian trip, the preparing with all the gear, and that same week I realized we are definitely raising adventurous kids because when we received 11 inches of powder on Monday, they begged me to let them skip school to go ski. Although maybe that was more about skipping school than skiing? 🤔

Later that week we watched an intense ski mountaineering video and Jackson immediately declared, “I want to ski off the top of that mountain too!”

And there I sat — one part of me swelling with pride, thinking, Yes. Be bold. Be adventurous.

And the other part of me thinking, No no no, that’s way too dangerous.

Now I sound like my dad!

Raising Adventurous Kids

So, then there’s that layer that feels even heavier — raising adventurous kids who might someday go bigger, harder, and more dangerous than you ever did.

When I watch Lindsey Vonn, I can’t help but wonder… is Charlie on a path that could someday look like that? She’s entering her own ski racing chapter next year. If she loves it — if she’s good at it — do I want that for her? Do I want to be the parent standing on the sidelines, heart in my throat, watching her hurl herself down an icy track at terrifying speeds? Or do I quietly steer her toward “safer” sports now? Are we already shaping that path by choosing alpine over Nordic?

And what if she’s destined for something big? Do I hold her back because it scares me?

Then there’s Jackson — our “Action Jackson.” He’s bold. He’s clumsy. He trips walking to the car half the time. Do I really want to watch him start throwing flips and spins in competitions? Do I want to see him eyeing big lines with big consequences? If I’m honest, that thought makes my stomach drop.

But then I circle back to everything I’ve already said. If that’s what makes him feel alive — if that’s where his gifts and passions lead him — how do I justify clipping his wings because I’m afraid?

A few years ago, I read The Adventurer’s Son by Roman Dial. It’s the story of a father searching for his son who went missing while backpacking in Central America. Roman raised his kids in Alaska immersed in adventure — travel, exploration, wilderness. After his son disappeared, he wrestled deeply with guilt. Did raising him this way lead him toward the very risk that took his life? Should he have protected him more?

I won’t spoil where he ultimately lands. But a few lines from that book have stayed with me:

“To live fully is to accept risk.”
“Adventure is not about death. It’s about life.”
“We do not protect our children by keeping them from living.”

And another quote I’ve heard that echoes the same tension:
“If we remove all risk, do we also remove the very experiences that make life meaningful?”

As much as it scares me, I believe we are meant to live in a way that makes us feel most alive. And if we believe that for ourselves, we have to wrestle with believing it for our kids, too.

I don’t want to die young. I don’t want them to die young. I don’t want to die anytime soon. But I also don’t want to live small. I don’t want them to live small. I would rather they live a full, expansive, brave life — even if it carries risk — than tiptoe to 90 wishing they had said yes more often.

And for the record, I think you can do both. I think you can live big, adventurous, meaningful lives and grow old, too.

But I’m curious — if you have older kids, how have you navigated this? Have you stood on the sidelines watching them do things that terrified you? Was it hard? And looking back, are you glad you let them chase it?

When Risk & Limits Change

I’ve also learned that your risk tolerance — your limits — aren’t fixed. They evolve.

When I first started backcountry skiing, I was brand new to skiing (former snowboarder over here 🙋🏼‍♀️), so steep terrain didn’t even tempt me. I was perfectly content living my best life on low-angle slopes. Zero desire to “push it.”

A few years later? I’ll admit — the steeper stuff looks more interesting. Not crazy steep. Not reckless. But steeper than where I started.

Growth changes things.

During our avalanche course a few weeks ago, one of the guides shared that his best friend and longtime ski partner set new rules when he became a dad. He no longer “toes the line.” He created firm personal guidelines — for example, if there’s a persistent weak layer in the snowpack, he simply doesn’t ski slopes above 30 degrees. Period. No debate. No powder fever exceptions.

I love that.

Because it acknowledges two things at once:

  1. You can love adventure.
  2. You can tighten your boundaries as your life changes.

Your limits might shift because your skills improve. Or because you have kids. Or because you’ve experienced loss. Or because you simply value things differently than you used to. That’s not weakness. That’s maturity.

And if I want to play in steeper terrain someday? Then I need to match that desire with deeper avalanche education, more mentorship, and more disciplined decision-making. Desire without growth is dangerous. Growth with guardrails is powerful.

Like that ski guide’s friend, maybe the answer isn’t avoiding adventure — maybe it’s defining your own rules for how you’ll engage with it.

Because when life changes, your boundaries should change with it.

If I Die in the Mountains

So if I ever die in an avalanche, or anywhere adventuring outside, let this be clear: I’m going to be really pissed. And I will be heartbroken for my kids, my husband, my parents. If someone handed me a crystal ball today and said, “You will die in an avalanche,” I might honestly sell my backcountry setup and become a resort-only skier. (Although… people die in avalanches at resorts too, so apparently nowhere comes with a full guarantee.)

The truth is, I could die mountain biking. Or hiking. Or driving to the trailhead. Or walking out my front door.

I’ve chosen lines I won’t cross — ski mountaineering with ropes and exposure isn’t for me. But I will step into slightly unsafe territory to be outside on my skis, my bike, my feet, because of how deeply alive it makes me feel.

And if I do die in an avalanche — kids, I am so sorry. Truly. But I hope the lesson you take isn’t “avoid the avalanche at all costs.” I hope it’s this: learn. Educate yourself. Respect the risk. Do everything you can to mitigate it. And then, if it’s something that sets your soul on fire, go.

Whether that’s living boldly in a big city, chasing extreme sports (deep breath thinking about you, Jackson), flying fighter jets, guiding in the mountains, or something none of us can even imagine yet — I hope you choose a life that feels so alive it’s worth navigating the risk.

I hope you gain the knowledge and experience to reduce injury and death as much as humanly possible. But even knowing risk is always lurking somewhere, I hope you move forward anyway — not recklessly, but bravely.

Alright, friends — I’m curious.

What have you done in your life that felt really risky… and afterward you thought, that was NOT worth it?
And what have you done that was terrifying… but absolutely worth it?

What’s calling you right now that scares you just a little?

As always, thank you for reading along.

Kelli

And before I fully close this out, I just want to say this — to the Tahoe families, the husbands, the children, the parents, the guides, the friends, the entire community grieving right now… I am so deeply sorry. I didn’t know those women personally, but I feel connected to them. They were moms. They were adventurers. They were friends who loved the mountains. They were doing something that made them feel alive. And my heart aches for the families who now have to navigate life without them. I am holding you in my thoughts and prayers. I am praying for peace, for strength in the days ahead, and for the mountain community to wrap around you in ways that feel tangible and steady. —–You are not forgotten.—–

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
That day my bestie and I skied low angle and epic terrain chasing deep deep powder! 
Survey to Elevate Our Lives Together

Your Goals Don’t Need More Motivation

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” — Lao Tzu 

Last month we had a powerful conversation about setting goals, clarifying intentions, understanding our desires, and getting real about what actually matters in life. If you missed it, go back and check it out because it’s POWERFUL. 

I’ll be honest—I felt a little bad leaving you all hanging for 30 days without telling you how to actually achieve those goals. But I did it on purpose. I wanted the power of those ideas to fester inside you… to simmer… to get bottled up and ready to explode. Because when the time came (which is now) to talk about how to truly make those goals happen, I wanted you fired up, hungry, and itching to take action.

So, my friends… let’s dive in.
Here’s how to start turning your wildest 2026 dreams into reality. 🔥

Understanding Your Why:

Okay—now take out that list of goals and desires you wrote down for 2026.

Find a quiet moment if you can. No distractions. No multitasking. Read through your list slowly and deliberately.

As you read, put a ⭐ next to anything that genuinely lights you up. The things that make you feel excited, energized, or even a little nervous in a good way. Your mind and body already know which ones matter—so get out of your own way and let the starring happen.

Next to those starred goals, add a date you’d like to achieve them—if one comes naturally. If it doesn’t, that’s okay too. No pressure. This isn’t about forcing timelines—it’s about creating intention.

Now… if you read any goals that no longer resonate, cross them off.

And just to be clear—don’t cross something off simply because it feels hard, scary, or far out of reach. That’s not what this is about. But if, after sitting with it for 30 days, you’re thinking, “Yeah… that doesn’t actually fit the 2026 version of me”—or maybe even any version of you—then honor that. Let it go.

Now for the real talk.

Something will have to give.

This is where we get honest—without judgment. If you want six-pack abs but drink a six-pack of beer every night… that math just isn’t mathing. 😉

So take a look at your starred goals and ask yourself:

  • Why do I really want this?
  • What would I have to give up to make it happen?

Time. Comfort. Habits. Distractions. Saying yes to fewer things. Saying no to things you like. Whatever it is—are you actually willing to give it up?

If the answer is no, that’s okay. Truly. Cross it off your 2026 list… but keep it for a someday-maybe version of you. Just not this season.

If the answer is still yes, then I want you to go deeper:

  • Why is this still a yes?
  • Why is it worth giving up X, Y, or Z?

Write that down. This becomes your North Star—the thing you come back to on the days you want to quit.

And right next to it, write what “enough” looks like once you achieve it. Because clarity around “enough” protects us from burnout, comparison, and the never-ending chase for more.

“But I don’t have time…”

Before we go any further, you might be thinking: There is no way I can add one more thing to my plate.

I get it. I’m a busy person too. And if I’m being honest, the moment I have free time, I usually fill it—volunteering for a nonprofit, coaching my kids’ soccer team, starting a new blog… you name it.

But here’s the truth:
You do have time.
It’s just a matter of what you’re prioritizing—and how efficiently you’re using it.

Fifteen minutes a day equals 91 hours a year.

So ask yourself:

  • What could I give up for 15 minutes a day?
    • Doom scrolling?
    • Hitting snooze?
    • One less episode?

The time is there.

Now let’s use it the right way.

Success Comes From Doing the Right Thing — Not Everything

That idea comes from The One Thing by Gary Keller—and it’s one I come back to again and again.

Most people don’t fail because they aren’t capable. They fail because they’re trying to focus on too many things at once instead of committing to the one right thing.

You can work really hard… but if you’re on the wrong road, all that effort won’t get you where you want to go. Direction matters just as much as discipline.

So let’s get intentional.

Narrow It Down — On Purpose

Look back at the goals you starred earlier.

Right now, I want you to choose just ONE of those starred items—the one that speaks the loudest, pulls at you the most, or feels the most important in this season.

This doesn’t mean the others don’t matter. It just means this one gets your focus first.

Now, walk yourself through this flow of questions. Don’t rush it—write your answers down.

The ONE Thing Question (By Time Horizon)

Instead of asking, “What should I do today?” we zoom out—and then narrow in.

  • Someday:
    What’s the ONE thing I want to achieve in my life?
    (This is that top starred goal.)
  • This Year:
    What’s the ONE thing I can do this year to move closer to it?
  • This Month:
    What’s the ONE thing I can do this month to support that yearly goal?
  • This Week:
    What’s the ONE thing I can do this week?
  • Today:
    What’s the ONE thing I can do today?

If that “one thing” feels overwhelming, it’s too big. Go smaller. Smaller is not weaker—it’s smarter.

Protect It Like It Matters (Because It Does)

Once you’ve identified today’s ONE thing, protect the crap out of it.

Time-block it into your calendar. I highly recommend doing it first thing in the morning, before life, kids, emails, and curveballs hijack your good intentions.

Then—this part matters—hold yourself accountable to actually doing it today. Not tomorrow. Not “when things calm down.”

A Gentle Warning (From Experience)

You can repeat this exercise for one or two more goals—but be careful.

Trying to focus on too many “one things” at once is how we end up achieving none of them. If you realize one goal will only take a few weeks or a month, you might even choose to dedicate one goal per month instead of juggling everything at once.

You know your life. You know your capacity. Your job is to build your goals into your real life—not on top of it.

And remember:
15 minutes a day goes a really long way.

So next, let’s talk about how to become more intentional, protective, and effective with your time—so the things that matter actually happen.

Becoming More Efficient With Your Time

To truly become more efficient, you don’t need a complicated system or a color-coded planner. You need better questions.

Anytime you’re doing something—or about to say yes to something—pause and walk yourself through these:

1. Why am I doing this?

This question alone cuts through so much clutter.

Is this actually important?
Is it aligned with my goals, values, or season of life right now?

If the answer is no, let it go. Efficiency isn’t about doing more—it’s about doing less of what doesn’t matter.

2. If it is important… how can I do this better?

If something truly needs to stay on your plate, the next question becomes:

  • Can this be simplified?
  • Can it be done faster?
  • Can part of it be automated, delegated, or restructured?

And here’s a little permission slip: if you’re stuck on how to do it better—ask ChatGPT. Build out new steps. Rethink the process. Efficiency often comes from redesigning how you do things, not pushing harder through the same old way.

3. Shorten the time you give yourself

I read a book a few years ago called The Vacation Effect, and it perfectly ties into goal-setting and habit building.

You know how you somehow get a week’s worth of work done in a day or two before leaving for vacation? That’s not magic—it’s Parkinson’s Law. Work expands to fill the time you give it.

When you intentionally shrink your time blocks, your focus sharpens and efficiency skyrockets.

The takeaway?

  • Stop giving tasks endless space.
  • Shrink the window.
  • Protect the time.

You’ll be amazed at how much faster—and better—things get done… leaving more room for the life you’re actually working toward.

And Finally… Learn to Say No

Your time will get eaten alive if you don’t protect it.

Saying no isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. And yes, it’s uncomfortable (especially for people-pleasers… hi, it’s me 🙋‍♀️).

If this is something you struggle with, I actually wrote a full Elevate Livin’ Life blog on the power of saying no, and I highly encourage you to read it. It’s a game-changer when it comes to reclaiming your time and energy.

Because when you protect your time, you protect your goals—and ultimately, the life you’re trying to build.

Atomic Habits to Make This Happen

Now that you’ve identified the actions, the next step is building the habits that actually support them.

I’ve already written about habit-building through the lens of the book Atomic Habits, so instead of reinventing the wheel here, I’m going to link that blog post and let you dive deeper into that world—because it’s powerful and incredibly practical.

That post also weaves in some big-picture thinking and “design your year” inspiration from one of my favorite motivational humans, Jesse Itzler—so you’re getting both the small daily habits and the big vision energy in one place.

But if I had to boil all of it down to one core habit rule, it’s this:

👉 Make it small enough to stick… but big enough to matter.
👉 And make it easy to do the right thing.

Habits don’t fail because we aren’t motivated enough—they fail because we make them too hard to maintain in real life.

For example:

  • I wanted to work on my photography, so I put my big, fancy camera in my kitchen, where I see it every single day.
  • I want to learn Spanish, so I put the Babbel app right next to Instagram on my phone—so it’s just as easy (or easier) to click that instead of scrolling.

No willpower required. Just smart setup.

Your environment matters more than motivation. When you make the habit obvious, accessible, and friction-free, consistency becomes a whole lot easier—and that’s where real change actually happens.

Road Bumps (Because They’re Coming)

Let’s talk about road bumps—because I promise you, they’re coming.

Sometimes it’s a small pothole.
Sometimes it’s a full-on roadblock with a giant DO NOT ENTER sign… where you fall flat on your face (like Charlie above 😅).

So instead of being surprised when it happens, let’s talk about it now—so you already have a plan when things get hard.

Looking at the 1–3 goals you’re actively working on, walk yourself through these questions.

1. Who are you becoming?

Ask yourself:

  • Who do I need to be to achieve this goal?
  • What identity am I stepping into?

This matters more than motivation.

For example, if you’re training for a marathon, start telling yourself:
I’m the kind of person who trains in all weather.

That way, when the first cold, rainy day hits, you still lace up your shoes—not because you feel like it, but because that’s who you are now.

Anchor into your identity and your why. That’s what helps you push through the hazards ahead.

2. Can you let go of perfection and ditch the all-or-nothing mindset?

This one is big.

If you planned to run 10 miles and only ran 6, don’t fixate on the 4 you didn’t do. Focus on the fact that 6 is better than 0.

This is not permission to give yourself excuses ahead of time—but it is a reminder that showing up imperfectly still counts.

Some days you won’t hit the goal exactly as planned. Still try anyway.
Progress beats perfection every time.

3. What’s your backup plan when life shifts?

Think about this in small doses and big doses.

Small pivot:
If you hurt your foot during training, instead of throwing in the towel and declaring the whole race ruined, pivot. Go swim. Row. Bike. Keep your cardio up so when your foot heals, you’re ready to jump back in.

Big pivot:
If you’re tracking your progress and getting really honest with yourself—and it’s clear the original goal isn’t happening—what’s a meaningful alternative?

If a marathon isn’t realistic, would a half marathon still feel like a win?

Again: something is better than nothing.

4. When everything is competing for your attention, ask: What’s important NOW?

When it’s time to work on your goal and a million other things are screaming for your attention, pause and ask:
What actually matters right now?

If the urgent thing truly needs your attention, then consciously let go of your goal for the moment—but reschedule it immediately.

If the distraction is laundry, dishes, or a messy house—and it’s your planned time to work out, cook the healthy meal, or move your body—let the mess go.

You can do laundry tomorrow.
You can’t “double up” tomorrow’s workout… because tomorrow already has its own workout.

5. Create rules that make decisions easier

Rules remove decision fatigue.

For example, we have a rule in our house:
If it snows more than 6 inches, we drop what we can and go ski.

If it’s only 4 inches, we don’t turn our whole day upside down to make it happen. But if we’re free and it works—hell yeah.

Those rules help us know when to act and when to let it go.

So ask yourself:

  • What rules could I put in place to support my goals?
  • What signals tell me it’s time to take action?

6. Why does becoming this person matter?

You already wrote your why.

Now go read it again.

Put it on your wall.
Screenshot it on your phone.
Stick it somewhere you’ll see it on the hard days.

Remind yourself why past-you wanted future-you to achieve this.

And then—respect that version of yourself enough to keep going.

Tracking & Accountability (The Part We Love to Hate… but Works)

Okay, I’m sorry—I kind of hate to say this.

But just dreaming and then doing usually isn’t enough.

Sometimes it is. But most of the time, if you really want to know whether you’re moving in the right direction, you need to track what’s actually happening—not to judge yourself, but to understand yourself.

Here’s the good news:
Tracking can be as simple or as advanced as you want it to be.

I’m going to share the new tracking plan I’m personally using this year. Take what works for you. Leave the rest. 😉

Daily: A Simple Nightly Check-In

Every night, I want to answer these four questions:

  1. What did I do today?
  2. What do I wish I did today?
  3. What are three amazing things that happened today?
  4. What are my top three priorities for tomorrow—so I end the day feeling as happy and fulfilled as possible?

That’s it. No perfection required. Just awareness.

Monthly: Zooming Out

Once a month, take a little time to review your answers. Look through your photos, your calendar, your notes—get a feel for how the month actually felt.

Then ask yourself:

  1. Where am I feeling happy about my life?
  2. Where am I feeling sad, frustrated, or stuck?
  3. What’s one moment from this month I want to remember in the future?
  4. Am I living a life I’m genuinely stoked to live?
  5. Where did I fall short on my goals?
  6. What could I change to get myself back on track?

This isn’t about beating yourself up—it’s about course correction.

Quarterly: The Bigger Picture Check-In

Once a quarter, slow down and reflect more deeply. Ask yourself how you’re feeling in each of these areas:

  • Physical Health
  • Mental & Emotional Health
  • Career
  • Financial Health
  • Work / Life Balance
  • Friendships
  • Family Relationships
  • Hobbies & Creativity
    (painting, photography, music, learning new skills, personal growth)
  • Light-Up-Your-Soul Activities
    (fun, travel, adventure, and the things that truly make your soul sing)
  • Material Life
    (home, vehicles, belongings)
  • Happiness & Joy
  • Purpose
    (meaning, fulfillment, legacy)
  • Spirituality
  • Character
  • ______And anything else you created for yourself—check back in on it now

This is about noticing patterns—not fixing everything at once.

Measure the Gain, Not Just the Gap

One last reminder that matters a lot.

If we only focus on our ideal future self and how far away we still are, motivation drops fast. Frustration creeps in.

So make sure you’re measuring backwards, too.

Compare where you are today to where you were last week. Last month. Last quarter.

Progress counts—even when it’s quiet.

This idea is beautifully explained in the book, The Gap and the Gain, and it’s one I come back to often.

When You Reach the Goal…

When you do achieve a goal, go back and reread your answer to this question:
“What will be enough?”

Because here’s what will happen—you’ll feel the pull to set a bigger goal. That’s normal. That’s growth.

But don’t let the chase for more steal the balance of a well-lived life.

Before pushing further, ask:

  • Is there another area of life that needs my attention right now?
  • Is maintaining this progress actually the goal for this season?

It’s okay if “better” this year doesn’t mean bigger.
Sometimes it means steadier. Or more balanced. Or more present.

And sometimes… staying exactly where you are is the ultimate win.

Parting Thoughts

You have the right to be happy.
You have the right to go after that happiness.

And yes—sometimes that might feel uncomfortable. It might even temporarily ripple into the lives of the people around you. But here’s what I truly believe: when you become a happier, truer, more aligned version of yourself, everyone wins.

You win.
Your family wins.
Your friends win.
Your community wins.
The world wins! 

Okayyyyy—I know I just went a little big-picture there 😉 but I really do believe this.

If more people lived as their meant-to-be selves…
If more people chased what actually made them feel alive…
If more people felt fulfilled at their core…

The ripple effect would be real. One happier person leads to another, and another, and another—until the world feels just a little lighter.

So if you’re struggling to do this just for yourself, do it for your kids.
Do it for the people you love.

But also—please—do it for you.

Don’t wait until you’re fearless.
It’s okay to be afraid.

Just saddle up anyway… and go get after it.

Thanks so much for being here, for reading, and for doing this work alongside me.

We’ll catch up again next month 😊

With gratitude,
Kelli

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
Skiing DEEEP Powder in the Avalanche Science Course with my Bestie

Is This the Year You Actually Live It? 

““The best way to predict your future is to create it.”” — Peter Drucker

As we step into a brand-new year, there’s often this collective feeling of freshness, renewal, and possibility in the air. Personally? I’m buzzing. I’m ready to shake off the special—but slightly sluggish—holiday season and dive into the new year with energy, focus, and motivation. Do you feel it too?

And if you do, but you’re not quite sure where to channel that energy yet, I’m here to help.
And if you don’t feel it—because winter has you in a fog, or you’re coming off a tough year, or you’re just plain tired—I’m still here for you too.

My goal this month isn’t to demand a full-blown transformation. It’s simply to help spark a small flicker inside you. Just a tiny one. Because flickers grow. And over time, that flicker can turn into a steady burn that nudges you toward becoming more of who you’re meant to be.

Maybe that change is small—like finally being brave enough to cut bangs (do it… it’s hair, it grows back, and being bald teaches you that ;)). Or maybe it’s big—starting that business, launching a nonprofit, changing careers, or saying yes to something that’s been quietly tugging at you for years.

Wherever you’re at on that spectrum, I’m here to help light the fire and help you put real, doable steps in place to move toward what you want next. Because, as I try to remind you and myself often, you never know how much time you have left. We miss our Nonna this holiday season and as I think of her, I think of the importance of living a life we want before it’s too late. 

Time for Review

In order to know how to channel the energy that might be pulsing through your body right now, you first need to understand what you actually want from this coming year. I’ve gathered a list of powerful questions to help get your mind thinking, scheming, dreaming, and believing.

But before we look forward, I want you to do me a favor: take just 10 minutes to look back.

I truly believe it’s important to reflect on what 2025 was for you—what you want to keep, what you want to change, and how it all actually felt. My kiddos and I did this activity yesterday and it was so fun to see their faces light up as they relived some of their favorite or best memories, like the time Jackson got a strike while bowling the first time! 

Step 1: Set the Scene

Pull out:

  • Your dream book (or a pen and paper if you haven’t created one yet)
  • Your phone with your Photos app open
  • Any journals you keep
  • Your calendar

Step 2: The 10-Minute Brain Dump

Set a timer for 10 minutes and write down everything you DID this past year.

Notice I didn’t say accomplished or achieved. I simply want what you did—the big things (trips, goals hit or missed, milestones) and the small things (like the day you went into your kindergartener’s class to read).

If you need help jogging your memory, scroll through:

  • Your photos
  • Your calendar
  • Your journals
  • Even your Strava or workout apps

Anywhere you captured moments from 2025—use it. Scroll through and review.

Pause

Okay. Now read back through your list.
Go ahead… I’ll wait 😉

Step 3: Go Deeper

Now, one by one, answer the following questions in your dream book. Don’t overthink them—write whatever comes to mind first. You can reference your list if needed, but trust your gut.

  • What moments from this past year made me feel most alive?
  • When did I feel most aligned with how I want to live?
  • What drained me more than I realized?
  • What did I overcommit to?
  • What do I wish I had done more of?
  • What did I survive that I’m proud of myself for?
  • What am I doing out of guilt, fear, or obligation?
  • What was my favorite memories from this year?
  • Am I where I thought I’d be at the end of the year?

The Whole Life

Once you’ve done that reflection, it’s time to zoom out even further.

Before I throw more powerful questions at you, I want to pause and remind you of something important: your life is not just one thing.

Your life is more than your work.
More than your kids.
More than your house.
More than your finances.
More than your trips, adventures, and hobbies.

Your life is all of it—woven together.

It’s the combination of these pieces, plus all the quiet, everyday moments in between. The small conversations. The routines. The seasons. The way you feel when you wake up in the morning and when your head hits the pillow at night.

Because of that, when you reflect and when you plan forward, it’s important to look at your whole life, not just the loud or obvious parts.

You can answer the next set of questions by breaking them into categories, or you can reflect more generally. There’s no right way to do this—just be honest with yourself.

If you’re feeling stuck or hyper-focused on one area of life (hello, work… or kids… or money…), here’s a list of core “big rocks” to help you think more holistically. These are the areas that, when neglected long-term, often lead to regret later in life.

Your Big Rocks

  • Physical Health
  • Mental & Emotional Health
  • Career
  • Financial Health
  • Work / Life Balance
  • Friendships
  • Family Relationships
  • Hobbies & Creativity
    (painting, photography, music, learning new skills, personal growth)
  • Light-Up-Your-Soul Activities
    (fun, travel, adventure, and the things that truly make your soul sing)
  • Material Life
    (home, vehicles, belongings)
  • Happiness & Joy
  • Purpose
    (meaning, fulfillment, legacy)
  • Spirituality
  • Character
  • __________
    (fill in anything that feels deeply important to you that’s missing)

None of these need to be “perfect.” The goal isn’t balance every single day—it’s awareness. Knowing which areas feel nourished, which feel neglected, and which might need a little more love this year.

Big Questions for Big Ideas

The reflection questions we covered earlier are powerful—but now it’s time to shift gears and look forward.

Before we talk about habits, systems, or action steps, I want you to pause and hear this clearly: right now is not the time to focus on the process.

This is dreaming mode.

We have to get honest about what we actually want—our deepest desires—before we can figure out how to make them happen. The process will come later, I promise. But first, we need clarity. And belief. And a little imagination.

So for now:

  • Don’t worry about how.
  • Don’t worry about if.
  • Don’t even worry about whether it’s realistic.

Seriously. If you want to go to the moon and be an astronaut—write it down. If you want to start a nonprofit, write a book, move abroad, run an ultra, quit your job, or reinvent your life—write it down. We’ll rein things in later. 😊

Before we zoom in on what you want 2026 to look like, I want you to zoom way out first. Spend a few minutes answering these big-picture questions:

Dream Bigger Than You Think You’re Allowed To

  • What are five things I would do if I knew I could not fail?
    We often decide what’s impossible before we explore what’s possible—don’t do that here.
  • What would I do / have / be if I had $10 million?
    This isn’t about money—it’s about uncovering what truly matters and what lights your soul up.
  • What does being successful look like to me?
    (Not society’s version—your version.)
  • What does being happy look like to me?
  • What do I want my life to look like across the “big rocks” I listed above?
  • What do I consider to be “enough”?
    Save this one. Future You will need it—especially when ambition starts pulling you toward burnout.
  • For business folks:
    If I could only work 2 hours per week on my business, what would I focus on?
    This reveals what actually matters and what you should protect your energy for.

Now Let’s Zoom In: What Will 2026 Look Like?

With that long-term vision in mind, it’s time to bring things closer to home. As you think about the year ahead, answer these with honesty and intuition—don’t overthink them.

  • What moments do I want to create this year that will make me feel most alive?
  • What does “being aligned” look like for me in the year ahead—and how do I want my days to feel?
  • Where do I need to be more intentional about saying no—so I don’t overcommit again?
  • What do I want to intentionally do more of this year, even if it feels small or simple?
  • What have I been thinking about starting but haven’t yet?
  • What would Future Me thank me for?
    (Especially long-term you.)
  • At the end of the year, what would make me proud of how I lived—not just what I accomplished?
  • Why does this goal matter to me personally?
  • How would achieving it actually make my life better or more aligned with my values?

If you take the time to answer these honestly, I promise—you’ll walk away with clarity, motivation, and a much deeper understanding of what you truly want.

And that’s where real change starts.

Keeping It Top of Mind

Now that you’re buzzing with the possibilities of what your future could hold, I want you to hold onto that energy. Don’t let it fade the way New Year motivation so often does. Make it real. Make it visible.

So promise me this—you’ll choose at least one of the options below to keep your dreams front and center this year, ideally right now while you’re excited about all these dreams and thoughts. 

1. Create a Vision Board

Either cut out lots of images from old magazines, have ChatGPT give you images, or save random ones from the internet; the goal is to create either a real “poster” style vision board that you can put in your house, somewhere you’ll see every single day—your closet, bathroom, office, or fridge. Or you could make a digital one and put it as the background on your phone. Let it quietly remind you of who you’re becoming and where you’re headed.

3. Make a Goal Jar

Write your goals, dreams, intentions, and even feelings you want more of on slips of paper and put them in a jar. Pull out one daily or weekly as a reminder and what you are to focus on this week or day. 
These can be tangible goals (“Run a marathon by September”) or more abstract ones (“Strengthen my relationship with my mother-in-law”). 

4. Calendar Seeding

Plant joy and intention directly into your calendar RIGHT NOW. 

  • If you want more connection with friends, go time block a coffee date in your calendar for next week.
  • If you want more vacations, go time block a long weekend in April in your calendar.
  • If you want more health and fitness, schedule out 1 hour on Sunday to work on meal prepping.

These can be things that light up your soul and things that move the needle in your career or personal growth. If it’s on the calendar, it’s more likely to happen.

5. The Bare-Minimum Option (Still Powerful)

Open ChatGPT and type something like:

“Hi there, I want 2026 to be my best year yet. I reflected and wrote out some goals and intentions—can I share them with you and have you turn them into a pretty infographic I can print and tape to my mirror?”

Or—keep it super simple—write your top 1–3 priorities on a sticky note and place it somewhere you’ll see daily.

The point isn’t perfection or tracking every little thing (at least not yet). It’s about keeping what matters top of mind, so your days naturally start aligning with the life you want to live.

Take Action

Okay, we’ve taken the first step by getting your goals and ideas out of your head and into the world—making them visible and top of mind. That alone is powerful.

Now, here’s the thing: the real magic—how to turn these dreams into actual, attainable action—is coming next month. I know, I know… I hate leaving you hanging for 30 days too. But I also don’t want to overwhelm you right now. This month’s newsletter is about clarity, intention, and momentum—not information overload.

That said… if you’re feeling fired up, energized, and ready to go right now, I have a little secret. The next Elevate Livin’ Life newsletter—focused entirely on taking action and building momentum—is already written and ready to share.

If you want it early, just send me an email asking for the Take Action edition, and I’ll happily send it your way.

Because when the spark is there, sometimes the best thing you can do… is move. 

What Are the Goals of Kelli Day?

Alright y’all… I’m getting personal. I’m putting these goals and intentions out there—out loud, in writing, and with you. Sharing your goals with others can be incredibly powerful (and yes, science actually backs that up). Accountability, clarity, momentum—it all grows when you stop keeping things locked inside your head.

So here’s what’s currently top of mind for my 2026. This list is still a work in progress as I continue refining my vision board and answering the questions above—but this is where my heart is right now:

• Use my passport at least twice 

• Snowmobile solo with my girlfriends
(Girl power. We can do hard things​!)

• Become fluent enough in Spanish to stumble through real conversations without immediately grabbing Google Translate

• Write 75 blog posts on my new blog

• Read 45 books this year

• Increase mobility
(15 minutes, 3x per week — or one yoga session weekly)

• Catch a sunrise or sunset outside every week

• Be outside 6 days a week for at least 30 unrushed minutes

• Lean out ~7 pounds only if I can maintain strong energy for the activities I love

• Weekly dates with my hubby to intentionally deepen our connection
(time to talk, laugh, dream, and keep choosing each other)

• Practice less consumerism
(still dialing in what this looks like — but buying with more intention and less impulse)

• Raise children, not grass
(ask me this story sometime — it’s a good one​)

Now it’s your turn.

Will you be brave enough to share your top-of-mind goals, intentions, mindsets, or dreams with me? Big or small, practical or wild—I want to hear what’s pulling at your heart right now.

Because putting it out there is often the very first step toward making it real. 

Thanks for reading along, 
-Kelli 

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
My first skin of the season in sunshine and powder! 

The Most Inspiring Conversation I Didn’t Expect to Have in Reno

“We don’t stop moving because we grow old. We grow old because we stop moving.” — Unknown

So, I was planning to wrap up the Health-Wellness Spectrum conversation this month with a big recap on the Five Factors of Health… and then something magical happened in a Reno casino hotel gym over Thanksgiving that completely hijacked this newsletter—in the best possible way.

Picture this: I’m grunting my way through a CrossFit-style workout in the corner of a very traditional hotel gym. Everyone else is on the stair stepper or doing bicep curls, and there I am dropping heavy dumbbell deadlifts and kicking up into handstand pushups against the wall… carefully, of course, so I don’t scuff the wallpaper and get kicked out of Reno. 😅

After I finish, this very fit, fiery older woman marches straight up to me and immediately starts chatting—asking what I’m training for, talking about movement like it’s her religion, basically preaching to the choir.

Naturally, I ask her about her life, and in five minutes I’m standing there thinking:
“This woman is an absolute badass… and holy crap, she is dropping some TRUTH BOMBS.”

Her energy. Her wisdom. Her no-nonsense attitude toward life and health.
Lightbulb moment after lightbulb moment.

So instead of a recap, I’m sharing the gold nuggets I got from this unexpected Reno angel. I hope they spark something in you, give you a needed kick in the pants, or at the very least entertain you.

Here we go. 💥

Never Stop Moving

In the five minutes I talked with Lori, this powerhouse of a 74-year-old woman said one phrase at least five times: “Never stop moving.”
Don’t stop because you’re older.
Don’t stop because you’re tired.
Don’t stop because you got sick.
Just. Don’t. Stop.
A little extreme for us younger bucks, sure—but to her, it wasn’t a cute saying. It was lived truth. She sees what happens when people stop. She told me she still works full-time as an attorney because staying sharp and keeping up with the 30-year-olds in her office keeps her mentally and physically alive.

 Her words instantly reminded me of something Ben Bergeron said on the Chasing Excellence podcast:
“You don’t go to the nursing home because you’re sick. You go because you lose the ability to function on your own.”
Falling. Moving. Caring for yourself. This is strength training for life.

But here’s the thing—you don’t have to be 75 for this to matter. Every year you do less—less movement, less challenge, less growth—your baseline slips. And the lower your baseline gets, the harder it is to bounce back when life hits you.

When I was diagnosed with cancer, I was so grateful my baseline was high. That year took a huge toll on my body and I dropped down a notch… but because I started high, I had somewhere to land.
If my baseline had been low? Getting back to healthy would’ve felt impossible.

**So let me ask you**:
Where’s your baseline today?
Where will it be tomorrow?
Where could it be a year from now if you decide—like Lori—to never stop moving?

It Takes Time

Lori shared an analogy I loved:
If you want to become a race car driver, you don’t start in a Ferrari.
You start small, build skills, and work your way up—slowly.
We live in a world of quick fixes: six-week shreds, magic programs, and six-pack promises. (Side note: I’ve been doing fitness for 13 years and still don’t have abs… though that might be more of a nutrition problem than a training problem, but that’s a conversation for another day. 😉)

If you’re just getting started—or even if you’ve been dabbling for a bit—please remember: progress takes time. Like… real time. Longer than any of us want it to.

And it’s not just overall fitness. Seasonal activities take time to come back to, too. As winter creeps in (hopefully soon!), don’t be shocked if your first day back snowshoeing, ski touring, or even downhill skiing feels a little rough. Sometimes it feels magical and sometimes it feels like your lungs have never worked a day in their life. This is normal. Your body needs time to readjust.
If you want a smoother transition, a lot of gyms offer “get in shape for ski season” or “bike prep” classes—super fun and super helpful.

And let’s talk about breaks. Long ones.
Whether you’re coming back from surgery, pregnancy, cancer (grrrrr), or simply a stretch of life where fitness fell off the plate… you won’t return as the same person who left. You have to rebuild. Slowly. With patience.
And sometimes? You may never get back to exactly where you were before—and that’s okay. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re entering a new era of you, one we’ll talk about more below.

Fitness Is Not an End Goal

Like I mentioned above, it takes time to get where you’re going… but here’s the real kicker: there is no final destination.
Yes, you’ll hit PRs.
Yes, you’ll crush a race you trained for.
Yes, you’ll have seasons where you feel strong, athletic, dialed in.
But if you truly want to win at fitness—and honestly, at life—you have to learn to love the journey and the process. Because fitness isn’t a 12-week finish line. It’s a lifelong habit, something you show up for daily (or close to daily), with no “end” in sight. And that’s a beautiful thing.

I once heard a wild statistic: quitting smoking makes a person 41% healthier. Makes sense, right? Now here’s the crazy part—supposedly, per a podcast I trust, you get that same 41% increase in health by improving your VO₂ max one level.
— They gave a dramatic example; if you went from running a 7:00-minute mile to a 6:30 mile, you’d gain the equivalent health jump of a smoker quitting. 🤯
Now… I don’t know the exact science behind the numbers (don’t come at me exercise physiologists), but the message landed hard:
Getting even a little fitter has a massive impact.
So don’t chase giant leaps—chase 1% better. Day after day.

And while we’re at it—remember this: fitness doesn’t care about your mood.
As the famous line from Dune says:

“What does mood have to do with it?”
You show up whether you’re tired, unmotivated, grumpy, or simply not feeling it.
Motivation is fickle. Discipline builds your life.
(Get your butt in the gym, lace up your shoes, or go for the rainy-day walk anyway… unless you’re actually sick—then rest like a responsible adult.)

Take the Harder Path

Choose the Stairs
Choose to park farther away. Choose the slightly harder option. Lori laughed as she told me, “It cracks me up watching people circle the parking lot for the closest spot… at the gym!” And honestly? She’s right.
These tiny choices compound over time. So start planting those seeds now: skip the elevator, walk the extra steps, load your own groceries, carry the heavy thing.
Choosing hard—especially in the small ways—builds a stronger you….physically AND mentally. 

Fighting the E-Bike (for Now 😉)

Lori said she has not succumbed to the e-bike and she proudly told me she still rides her 30-pound, 25-year-old Diamondback—and that it’s a workout just loading it into her truck.
 
I personally know the day may come when I welcome an e-bike into my life, and I fully support people who love theirs. E-bikes are amazing for accessibility, inclusivity, and helping people ride farther and longer.

But for me, right now, choosing the non-motorized route keeps me stronger. It forces me to work a little harder, push a little more, and stay honest with my fitness. Someday I’ll probably be cruising around on one too… I just hope it’s when I’m in my 80s. 😉

Taking Aging in Stride

Despite fighting the e-bike life, Lori admitted she’s back on a foam surfboard these days. We both instantly jinxed and said, “At least you’re still out there surfing though!” And truly—that’s the point. Push off the aging process as long as you can, but know that adjustments will come. You’ll go lighter, slower, shorter, or simpler at times, but you’re still out there, moving, trying, showing up. And that is pretty freaking incredible.

As things shift, keep this in mind:

▫️ Reassess your life every few years.
New season? New decade? New baby? Surgery? Illness? Injury?
There’s no shame in creating new PRs for the version of you who exists now. Progress isn’t always linear—it’s cyclical, evolving, and personal.

▫️ Your training needs may change.
Maybe five days a week in the CrossFit gym was right once, but now three feels better. Maybe running 50 miles a week hits different in your 40s and 30s–40 miles is your sweet spot now. The key is to be stubborn enough to stay consistent, but gracious enough to adapt.

• And remember: sometimes the “new you” is actually the better you.
I’ll admit, I still get sad when I can’t squat what I used to, or clean & jerk over 200 lbs. But then I zoom out—I have a much more balanced life now. I hike far, I lift heavy-ish, I outrun my kids (for now), and I keep up with Tony on the bike most of the time. That version of me is strong in ways that matter more than just the numbers.

Giving Up

In the short time I spent talking with Lori, I got the sense she’s not someone who gives up on much of anything. Except, occasionally… on people. Not because she doesn’t love them, but because she’s exhausted from trying to motivate the friends who say they’ll hike with her (despite being scared), she gets so excited, and then—bam—they bail.

She knows they’re nervous. She knows they worry they won’t be able to keep up. But here’s the thing: she doesn’t care. She doesn’t mind going slower. She doesn’t mind taking breaks. She just wants the joy of the company.

And honestly? I feel the exact same way. If I invite you on a hike, it’s because I want you there. I won’t invite you on certain big, gnarly hikes because I know they’re too much (or because I selfishly want to go fast or sometimes alone). But if I do invite you, it’s because I already know your pace, your ability, your vibe—and I still want to spend that time together.

So if you’re one of those people who wants to say yes but worries you’ll “slow someone down,” hear this clearly:

You’re probably right — you probably can’t keep up.
But if someone invited you anyway? That means speed isn’t the point. Connection is. The adventure is secondary to the time together. And they’re totally fine stopping 100 times if it means sharing the trail with you.

Inspiring One Person

Despite her frustrations with friends bailing on hikes, Lori wrapped up our conversation with this simple truth: “If you can motivate or inspire one person, then it’s worth it.” And honestly, that hit me right in the heart.

Because that’s exactly what these Elevate Livin’ Life newsletters are about for me. I pour a lot of time, energy, and thought into them — time I could spend outside with friends, or adventuring, or, let’s be real, cleaning my house. And sometimes I wonder, Does this matter? Is anyone even reading this? Why am I doing this?

But then one of you emails me back…
Or tells me a story…
Or shares it with your family…
Or asks a question that sparks something deeper…

And in that moment I’m reminded — yep, it’s worth every minute if it helps even one of you.

And here’s the part for you: you also have a voice. You are an expert in something. You have lived experiences, hard-earned wisdom, and unique stories that someone out there needs. Don’t be afraid to speak up. Don’t be afraid to share. Don’t be afraid to spark a conversation with a stranger who feels like a kindred spirit.

Just like Lori did with me.
And yes — I did awkwardly ask her for a photo, because I knew I didn’t want to forget her anytime soon.

As always, thank you so much for reading along and being part of this community. I hope you have a fabulous holiday season — full of movement, joy, connection, hopefully skiing?!? and maybe even a few magical encounters with strangers who feel like soul friends.

— Kelli

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
Hiking on Black Friday in Tahoe in 70 Degrees with Lots of Family! 

The Power of Pause

“The quality of your thinking determines the quality of your life.” -A.R. Bernard

The old Kelli would’ve looked at the Think bucket and thought, “Eh, that’s important—but not that important,” definitely not as crucial as the other buckets of the Wellness Spectrum (Eat, Sleep, Train, Connect).

The new Kelli knows better. The new Kelli has spent the past eight years juggling more than ever—building a business, raising two kids, remodeling homes, moving, traveling, and all the life that happens in between. Yet, in that chaos, she’s also carved out more space to think—often thanks to mom schedules that force me to adventure alone.

And now I know. Now I see how vital this bucket really is. Thinking—truly pausing, reflecting, and being intentional—has changed everything for me. And I hope, by the end of this newsletter, you’ll see why it matters so much for you too.

Why Do You Need to Take Time for Your Mind?

Life is full of challenges—some you joyfully signed up for and others you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy. And when those hard times come, you’ll wish you’d trained your mind as much as your body.

When you build mental strength, you give yourself tools to weather the storm: the ability to “pull from your cookie jar” (as David Goggins says), to adopt a growth mindset (more on that below), and to see obstacles as opportunities instead of just pain and struggle.

I recently listened to a book that referenced Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. If you’re unfamiliar, Frankl was a Jewish psychologist imprisoned in Nazi concentration camps during WWII. He lost his entire family, endured unthinkable suffering, and barely survived. Yet even in those horrific circumstances, he made a promise to himself: he would endure, observe, and someday write a book that could help others find meaning in suffering. That sense of purpose and mindset quite literally kept him alive.

As Ben Bergeron says,

“We fear adversity and do everything we can to avoid it, even though it’s a guaranteed part of life for every species on planet Earth. It’s not a matter of if we’ll encounter it, but only a matter of when. And when we do face it, the form the adversity takes is far less important than how we respond to it.”

So, taking time for your Think bucket isn’t just about journaling or meditation—it’s about mental conditioning. It’s preparing your mind for the unknown, building resilience, and finding strength when life inevitably throws its curveballs.

How to Find Time to Think

So, how do I find time to think when life feels busier than ever? Honestly—it happened by accident. My “mom schedule” didn’t line up with my friends’ or my husband’s, so I started adventuring solo. At first, it felt awkward and even a little scary. But I laced up my hiking shoes, grabbed my furry sidekick, and went anyway.

And here’s the beautiful part—I fell in love with it. Those solo adventures became my best brainstorming sessions. That’s when my mind starts to wander, connect dots, and dream up new ideas. Don’t get me wrong, I still love my girl gang and exploring with my husband, but there’s something magical about the quiet of going alone.

So, here’s my challenge to you: time block just 20 minutes this week. Go for a walk—no podcast, no phone call, no distractions—and simply think. Let your mind wander. You might be surprised by the clarity that shows up when you finally give yourself the space for it.

How to Think

This might sound silly, but in today’s world of constant distraction and endless entertainment, many of us have actually forgotten how to think. If you followed the steps above to find the time to think, now let’s dive into how to think intentionally.

• Start with Direction
Before you let your mind wander, choose what you want to think about. Are you focusing on your life goals? Your work or business? Your health and fitness? Or maybe it’s your relationships or parenting?
Depending on my mood, I’ll direct my thoughts differently. Some days I want to think about business growth; other days, I reflect on my life, my habits, or my parenting. The key is to give your thoughts a little structure—so they’re productive, not chaotic.

• Listen to a Podcast or Audiobook (and Then Pause It)
Wait—what? Yes, sometimes my brain is spinning with the wrong kind of thoughts, and I need something to anchor me. That’s when I’ll put on a podcast or audiobook to help guide my thinking—something about mindset, business, health, or wellness.
Usually, I’ll listen for a bit, then pause it once my brain starts firing with ideas. I’ll even jot notes in my phone or email myself reminders of insights I want to implement. (Fun fact: most of these newsletters are born during those moments!)

• Questions to Get Your Brain Flowing
Here are some of my favorite prompts to help you start thinking intentionally:

🧠 Dreaming About an Epic Life

  • If you could have any life you wanted in one year, what would it look like?
  • If you were told today you had one year to live, how would you spend it—both in what you’d do and how you’d live mentally and physically?
  • If money, logistics, and fear were off the table—what would you do, where would you go, or who would you become?

💼 Thinking About Business or Work

  • What’s working well in my business or career right now?
  • What’s one thing that’s holding me back from the next level?
  • If I could only focus on three things this month that would move the needle most—what would they be?

• And of Course—Read Some Elevate Livin’ Life Newsletters 😉
You know I’ve got your back when it comes to mindset, motivation, and designing a life that feels good inside and out. Here are a few of my past favorites: 

Does Your Mind Need Work?

Growth Mindset + My Favorite Mindset Mantras

Ask yourself this: Do you live in a hostile or friendly world? Your answer says a lot about your mindset. If you tend to believe the world is against you, that people are out to get you, or that life is just one uphill battle — it might be time to work on shifting that lens. Because your mindset shapes how you see everything.

Thoughts are like clouds — they roll in, some heavy and dark, but if you don’t latch onto them, they pass and make space for light to shine through. You can’t control every thought, but you can control what you do with it. That’s the foundation of a growth mindset — learning to observe your thoughts without judgment, redirect them when needed, and remind yourself that challenges aren’t punishments, they’re opportunities.

Here are a few of my favorite mindset mantras that help me stay grounded, curious, and positive when life gets messy (or just really hard):

  • Be in the Gain, Not in the Gap — remember this one from the Train Bucket newsletter last month? Focus on how far you’ve come, not how far you have to go.
  • This is an Opportunity, Not an Obstacle — I once noticed on a mountain bike climb that I kept avoiding small, annoying rocks by going around them. In that moment, I realized, although they’re not as fun as the techy desert rocks I love, they were an opportunity to get better — to practice, to grow, to be ready for the next challenge. So, the next time you are presented with a challenge, whether big or small, I encourage you to take the harder route. If nothing else, it conditions your mind knowing you choose hard and came out on the other side. 
  • Be Curious, Not Judgmental — When things go wrong, instead of asking yourself “why me”, get curious and ask, “what can I learn?” And when you watch others do something that upsets you, before you judge them, think to yourself, “do I know their full story and situation?” Perhaps they have a justified reason for choosing the way they did…and perhaps you would have chosen the same option as well if you were in their shoes. 
  • I Get to Do This, Not Have to Do This — shift your words, shift your world. Gratitude changes everything. You get to change your babies’ diaper in the middle of night because you get to have kids, not everyone gets that. You get to go to work and provide for your family, not everyone has that opportunity. 
  • Focus on What You Can Control — your attitude, effort, and consistency are always within your power regardless of what is thrown at you. 
  • “Success is not a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.” – Unknown 

If you start applying even one of these regularly, you’ll feel your inner voice change. The goal isn’t to erase the hard stuff — it’s to meet it with strength, perspective, and gratitude.

Want to Dig Deeper?

If this Elevate Livin’ Life newsletter is singing to you and you’re craving more — more growth, more mindset shifts, more inspiration — here are some of my favorite books, podcasts, and thinkers that have helped shape how I think (and live).

📚 Books to Expand Your Mind

  • The Dream Manager — Dream big, my friends. This one will have you visualizing your ultimate life and believing it’s possible.
  • Mindset: The New Psychology of Success — The OG on growth mindset. Full of relatable stories and science-backed insights on why your mindset matters more than talent.
  • Chasing Excellence — Where the Five Factors of Health all started. Learn how elite athletes train their minds just as much as their bodies.
  • The Daily Stoic — Bite-sized wisdom that helps ground you in perspective, gratitude, and calm — one page at a time.
  • The Comfort Crisis — A life-changer that challenges you to get uncomfortable and rediscover your strength.
  • The Well-Lived Life — Beautiful lessons on purpose, longevity, and joy from a 102-year-old doctor.
  • Can’t Hurt Me — Pure mental toughness fuel. You’ll never say “I can’t” the same way again.
  • Essentialism — The art of saying no to the non-essential and creating space for what really matters.
  • The One Thing — Focus, simplicity, and massive progress — one small action at a time.
  • Atomic Habits — A must-read for anyone looking to make small changes that create huge results.
  • The Obstacle Is the Way — Okay, truthfully, I haven’t read this one yet, but I’ve heard amazing things. It’s next on my list!

📨 Newsletters & 💭 Podcasts That Make You Think

Podcasts for Life & Growth:

Podcasts for Parenting:

Podcasts for Business & Purpose:

  • Diary of a CEO — Deep, raw, and insightful interviews about life, business, and success.
  • Or, search for industry-specific podcasts that speak directly to your world — there’s gold waiting for you out there.

Wrapping It All Up

If you take nothing else away from these Elevate Livin’ Life newsletters on the Five Factors of Health — Eat, Sleep, Train, Connect, and Think — please take this:

**Be alone at least once a week for 30+ minutes and give yourself the gift of time to THINK. **

No music. No podcast. No scrolling. Just space for your own thoughts to breathe.

Build this into your life like you would any healthy habit. Make it a routine. Protect it. And as always — bonus points if you do it outside. 😊

What about you? I’d love to hear — what are your favorite podcasts, books, or mantras that help you think deeper and live better?


Thanks for reading along! 
–Kelli 

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
Our Annual Mom & Kid Trip to Maui!! 

Train for Life, Not Just for Looks

“The only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen.” – Unknown

You guys, last week kicked my butt. Like, whoa.

I’ve been doing CrossFit for over 13 years now, but this week? It felt like I was brand new all over again. Monday’s jumping chest-to-bar pull-ups torched my calves. Tuesday’s 100 dumbbell snatches lit up my hamstrings. Wednesday, I waved the white flag and rested. Then Thursday, heavy front squats and real chest-to-bars came back swinging. And for some reason, I thought Friday was the perfect day to toss in a bunch of core work and deadlifts. By Saturday… a hobbling mess. 🫠

And the best part? This morning I planned to write this month’s Elevate Livin’ Life Newsletter — and the topic? The Train bucket. Yep, all about fitness and movement. How fitting.

It’s been a while since we checked in on the Five Factors of Health (Eat, Sleep, Train, Think, and Connect). If you’re new here or need a refresher, you can check out [this original post] that walks you through it. I know I got a little sidetracked with finishing the discussion on these buckets (life, right?), but let’s get back to it because these five factors are foundational to a healthier — and ultimately, happier — life.

So, let’s talk about TRAIN.

Struggles at First

If you know me now, you know I love to exercise. Whether it’s lifting in the gym, hiking up a mountain, biking loops big and small, or hauling a backpack through the wilderness — I like to go, go, go. I love what movement does for my mind just as much as what it does for my body (even when I’m hobbling around sore like I am right now 😅).

But believe it or not, I wasn’t always like this.

Back in college and the years right after, I felt completely lost. I wasn’t prioritizing my health, I wasn’t consistent, and I didn’t feel good in my skin. Sure, I could jog a bit or hike a few miles, but overall I was overweight, out of shape, and drifting. I had been active by default through high school and college rec league sports — but once that structure ended, I didn’t know how to move forward. And that feeling sucked.

I tried the gym (Gold’s Gym, baby), but I had no plan. I’d float aimlessly from machine to machine or hit the stair stepper over and over again. It was boring. It was discouraging. I was trying… but I didn’t know what I was doing.

Eventually, I asked my (rather fit and knowledgeable) husband for help — and he introduced me to CrossFit. That’s where it all began to change, but still it changed slowly. And please, don’t stop reading here! This is not a newsletter to try to convince you to become a CrossFitter!! It’s so much more than that. 

CrossFit Was Not for Me (At First)

Ya’ll know how much I love CrossFit now. But when I first started — back when we lived in New Hampshire for a few years — it didn’t quite click.

I tagged along to classes with Tony, and yeah, it was better than wandering around Gold’s Gym, but I didn’t love it. I felt awkward surrounded by super-fit people, half of whom were in PT school with my husband. They were all nice, but I couldn’t help feeling a little out of place. (Totally my own insecurities — not their fault!) I was getting fitter, and it was fun-ish… but it wasn’t the obsession it is for me now.

I’m sharing this to remind you that if you’re currently feeling lost or unsure how to bring fitness into your life — you’re not alone, so here are a few things to keep in mind if that’s you right now:

💡 1. You might not like it at first — and that’s okay.
Just because something doesn’t click right away doesn’t mean it never will. And sometimes it’s not the activity that’s the issue — it’s the environment. The first CrossFit gym I went to didn’t feel like my place. Years later, I found a gym with a totally different vibe and it changed everything. So whether it’s CrossFit, spin, yoga, or pickleball… give it a chance. And try somewhere else if it doesn’t feel right.

💡 2. Starting something new usually sucks.
You’ll be sore. You’ll feel awkward. You’ll think you’re bad at it. That’s all normal. Just because it’s hard doesn’t mean it’s wrong for you — it just means you’re at the beginning. (Spoiler alert: I couldn’t do a single pull-up when I started!)

💡 3. Find a buddy.
A class that holds you accountable, a friend to work out with in your garage, or even a weekly walking group — community is everything. It keeps you consistent and makes it way more fun. 😊 Did you know when my mom found out she was pregnant with me at 36 (which was OLD back then) she freaked out and called a good friend and convinced her to walk with her daily to get her in shape for labor, and now, 38 years later they still walk multiple times a week! 

💡 4. A pair of dumbbells goes a long way.
Seriously. You don’t need a fancy gym to get strong. A solid pair of dumbbells and a little consistency can take you further than you think. I know the PERFECT programming that works off of just one pair of dumbbells at home if you need some recommendations. 

💬 5. Got other tips?
I’d love to hear what helped you stick with fitness when you were getting started. Drop me a reply!

Finding Love (with Movement)

So… CrossFit round one? Not a love story.

Sure, I stuck with it and definitely got fitter, but it wasn’t a magical experience. After that, we moved a few times (thanks, PT school rotations), doing a mix of things: some workouts on our own, a little running, a few random classes. It was okay — but nothing really clicked.

Then we moved to Boise, and that’s when everything changed.

We joined Boise CrossFit, and even though I still carried a lot of the same insecurities I had back in New Hampshire, something finally shifted. I started working through those fears, instead of letting them define me. At first, I just wanted to get physically fit — and that happened. But what surprised me most were the mental benefits.

It was a total mindset shift. I’d always leaned toward a more fixed mindset — shying away from the hard stuff, doubting my abilities. But fitness, and especially CrossFit, taught me how to grow through challenge. I used to dread hard things. Now? I crave them. I seek them out.

And honestly, I believe that training — the hours in the gym, the miles on the trail, the sweat and soreness — prepared me for the biggest battle of my life: kicking cancer’s ass. When you train your body and your mind to face adversity every day, you build resilience that carries over into every area of life.

Okay, enough of my sappy love letter to movement. 😅

Tips to Help You Build a Fitness Life You’re Stoked On

If you’re working on creating a fitness rhythm that actually sticks (and that you maybe even look forward to), here are some of my favorite tips to get you there:

🏆 Consistency is King

  • The real game-changer is building fitness into your routine. Like brushing your teeth — you don’t question it, you just do it.
  • There will be days you don’t feel like working out. But if it’s part of your identity — part of your non-negotiables — you’ll show up anyway. That’s where the magic happens.
  • Don’t stress too much about what you’re doing at first. Focus more on just showing up regularly. Rain, snow, vacation — movement is movement.
  • Speaking of vacation: Fitness and travel can go hand-in-hand! I’ve done workouts at kids’ parks across the country, the Excalibur parking lot in Vegas, on the grass strip out front of that same hotel, in pools, and more.
  • One of my favorite things is dropping into a local gym when I travel — you meet people and see their world from the local’s perspective, and it’s honestly just fun.
  • Once you’ve built a deep fitness habit, you’ll also know when it’s okay to rest. You can take a week off without spiraling because your baseline is strong, and your habit is there waiting when you’re ready.

🌀 It Doesn’t Have to Be Pretty

  • I can’t even count how many 20-minute workouts I’ve done where even the warmup is part of the workout, and that’s okay.
  • Something is always better than nothing. Walk. Do 30 pushups. Swing a kettlebell 50 times. Just move.
  • Going to the gym for 15 minutes might not change your body — but it reinforces your identity. You’re someone who shows up and believes in the importance of movement. 
  • Bad workouts are important. It’s easy to show up when you feel great — it matters even more when you show up tired, sore, or unmotivated.

⏱ When You Truly Don’t Have the Time

  • First… are you sure? 😉 Sometimes it’s not about time, it’s about priorities. If you’re maxed out on time, try doing a mini life audit:
    • How much scrolling are you doing? 
    • How much TV are you watching?
    • Where are your pockets of time slipping away?
  • But if you’re legitimately running at max capacity with good things, try this:
    • Walk during your kids’ soccer practice. Or if you’re at home with kids, do a family workout! 
    • Do 20 air squats between stirring dinner.
    • Install a treadmill under your standing desk. Or take walks during phone meetings. 
    • Do 15 pushups while your shower warms up each day. 

      **Habit-stack your movement into what you’re already doing.**

My Favorite Fitness Mantras to Power You Up 💪

There are still days I’m not motivated. Days when I drag myself to the gym and feel sluggish. And even the days when I am motivated, there are workouts that absolutely wreck me. In those moments, I dig deep—and these are the mantras I lean on. I hope they help you too.

“I’m Not Tired, I Feel OUTSTANDING!”

One of my all-time favorites comes from Jesse Itzler. His energy is contagious, and this saying has become a family motto. My kids even know to yell “OUTSTANDING!” when I ask how they feel. It’s a mindset shift—check out the video here.

Action Over Perfection & The Only Bad Workout Is the One You Didn’t Do

Just start. Don’t overthink it. Walk out the door. Move your body. Take a push-up break at the park. Climb the stairs. Jog a few steps. Something is always better than nothing.

The Only Way Out Is Through

Once you’ve decided you’re not a quitter, this becomes your mantra. The workout might suck, but you’re not leaving. You’re just getting through it—step by step.

Consistency Is King & Discipline Over Motivation

I know I already touched on this above, but it’s worth repeating. Don’t rely on motivation—it’s flaky. Discipline is what builds your future. Be the kind of person who shows up, even on the days you don’t feel like it. You can also create a Don’t Fail Plan for yourself. If you know something might come up to cause you to not achieve your fitness plan, then tell yourself BEFORE you get there what you’ll do? Bad weather- run anyways or go to the pool for swim? Work went long- workout after the kids are in bed. Forgot your shoes- do upper body movements today. 

Be in the Gain, Not in the Gap

I’ve been loving The Gap and the Gain (more on that in a future newsletter). But here’s the gist: don’t focus on where you aren’t—celebrate how far you’ve come. It’s okay to dream, but don’t let that dream steal your joy from the present.

Pull From Your Cookie Jar

David Goggins fans, you’ll get this one. When you do hard things, you create a “cookie jar” of resilience. And when the next challenge shows up? You pull from that jar. I think back to chemo, to the brutal days during treatment—and remind myself: if I got through that, I can get through this.

I also had ChatGPT to design a pretty little infographic for you with all these sayings. Print it. Stick it on your fridge. Tape it to your mirror. These aren’t just workout mantras—they’re life mantras. 💥

Finding Grace Through Life’s Changes:

I’ve had my fair share of surgeries and medical procedures in the past ten years. From my 2015 cancer journey of chemo, surgeries, etc. to two pregnancies, to hysterectomy and more. And I’ve also aged over the past ten years (obviously). Through all these different phases I have discovered a few things with exercise. 

1. As best you can, roll with the changes and accept them rather than fight them. Listen to your doctors and physical therapists but also listen to your body. They know what is generally the acceptable things to do during these times (surgeries, recovery, etc) yet they also are learning all the time by people showing there is more that can be accomplished. During my cancer treatment, I worked out frequently but set very few PRs. I climbed a 12,000 footer and mountain biked regularly. But I also had times that I overdid it, like that one day my sister in law was visiting and we had a super fun time pushing each other in the gym, until hours later it hit me and I was lay up and a total mess for hours from accidentally overdoing it. Oops. 

2. When I turned 35 I was determined to still be strong and fit, especially in my “CrossFit” world. I remember being bullheaded to go hard in every workout, do all the prescribed weights and not let myself “fall behind” just because I was older, old enough that CrossFit now considered me apart of the “masters” age divisions. I’d show them. Well… they showed me.  They showed me there is a reason they made these divisions and different age groups (35-39, 40-44, etc). Because each of those 5 years, things really CAN change. They don’t always change but they might and it’s okay. Now, my swolemate and I love to text each other our times for the workout and talk about how that might be the only workout this week we go at that high intensity. The conversations I have with my other girlfriends revolve around “man, I went on an epic hike yesterday, but today I’m going to get a massage and do yoga tomorrow.” Yes, there are some weeks we go big over and over and over again and it’s fun, but we know it’s not ongoing all the time as it’s not sustainable. 

3. As they (whoever they are) has said, “when one door closes another door opens”. So lately my strength numbers are sooooooo low. I used to be able to Clean & Jerk 205# and these days I’m lucky if I could hit 175#. But, I can hike farther and faster than the past Kelli. And even if I couldn’t, it’s a part of life to change what you’re able to do and take it gracefully. NOW, that’s not to say it’s time to let yourself slip into doing nothing. That’s a really bad plan! 🙂 

Wrapping It Up

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how you move — what matters is that you do. Movement is a gift, and building a consistent practice around it can unlock confidence, clarity, energy, and resilience you didn’t know you had. Whether you’re lifting heavy in the gym, going for a walk at lunch, chasing your kids on bikes, or hiking up a mountain, every bit of movement is a deposit into your health bank.

So let this be your nudge, reminder, or loving kick in the butt to get moving in a way that feels good to YOU. Start small, stay consistent, and don’t worry if it doesn’t look “perfect.” You’ll be amazed what can happen when you just keep showing up. Oh and if you need a little motivation, join the McCall Streak (sorry fellas, ladies only) to get you motivated over the next few months! And if you need a recommendation of a guru with programming fitness for your goals, check out my buddy Ryan at RDH Endurance. 

You got this — and I’ll be cheering for you every rep, step, and breath of the way. 💪❤️

Until next time,
Kelli

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
Chasing Fall Colors Through Washington Mountains…and unexpected Snow!

You Won’t Know Unless You Go 

The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” – Joseph Campbell

You Won’t Know Unless You Go:

It was a stormy Friday—cooler temps, sprinkling rain, and thunder rumbling in the distance. Not exactly ideal weather for heading out on a family backpacking trip. But August in Idaho is known for fast-moving mountain storms, so we kept packing, hopeful it would pass.

We drove 45 minutes to the trailhead under swirling dark skies, radar in hand, thinking maybe it wouldn’t rain for long… and hopefully no lightning. But the moment we stepped out of the car—CRACK! A massive boom echoed across the sky. Lovely, Thunder, Lightning, Mighty Mighty Frightening! 

The trail we’d planned was short and sweet, but also totally exposed—not exactly where you want to be in an electrical storm with two young kids and a thunder-sensitive dog. So, we pivoted. We found a random backcountry restaurant serving pizza, salad bar, and even the game Operation (big win for the kids!). As we drove there, the skies opened up. Torrential downpour. Hail. Blinding sheets of rain. Lightning bolts flashing all around. We were so glad we hadn’t started hiking.

And still—I wasn’t mad we made the trip out to the trailhead. Because the truth is: you won’t know unless you go. And guess what else happened?! After dinner, the skies cleared completely. Not a cloud in sight and radar confirmed a single storm cell had rolled through—right after we’d checked earlier. Go figure.

It was 8 p.m. by the time we got back to the trailhead, but we decided to hike in anyway. The trail was wet (okay, soaked), our pants and dog got drenched, but wow—the light. That soft, glowy, golden light. Everything was green, lush, and peaceful. It reminded me: yes, be safe and smart in the mountains—but don’t let fear always call the shots. Sometimes you have to take the risk, because the beauty and magic you find might just be worth it.

And honestly? Sometimes the chaos is the memory.

It’s Worth the Pain:

After that magical golden-lit hike into camp, I’ll be honest—the shine started to wear off fast. It was getting late, all the best campsites were taken (WTH?!), and it was dark, wet, and cold. The kids were doing great, full of energy and excitement, which also meant they were a handful and not particularly helpful. The dogs kept trying to sneak into the tent, soaking wet and muddy. Tony and I? We were cranky, annoyed, and seriously questioning our life choices. Why do we think this is fun again? 

We could’ve stayed home, had a cozy dinner, and called it a night. But instead, we crammed into the tent, laughed our butts off at our new dog Harry sleeping on top of me, and bonded through the chaos. No, we didn’t get a great night’s sleep—but we had a memorable one. And we woke up to a beautiful mountain lake. That’s why.

The next day, we bushwhacked to another lake about a mile away. The kids trudged through bushes up to their waists (or necks!) in good spirits, fueled by their new obsession: fishing. All was going pretty great—until Charlie had an emotional, sassy meltdown. These days, her breakdowns are less kicking and crying and more teenager vibes. Lord help us when we get to the real teenage years.

Tony and I passed her back and forth like a hot potato, trying to navigate this new world of pre-teen parenting. In those hard moments, the same doubts creep in: Why do we do this? Is anyone even having fun? Is she going to ruin it for everyone? But, just like life, we worked through it. We came out stronger—and Charlie caught three gorgeous brook trout! The lake was full of frogs, snakes, and zero people. Pure Idaho magic.

That night, our friends hiked in to join us. It was their first ever family backpacking trip—with two kids under five, one of them just 18 months old. I was blown away by their determination. And even though their tent echoed with cries all night (thank you, earplugs), they were smiling, mostly, the next morning. When I asked if it was worth it, they both said yes—because they’ve had harder nights at home, and the memories from these 24 hours were worth every challenge.

So here’s your reminder: if you’re debating doing something hard, something messy, something that might include a bit of suck—do it anyway. You’ll catch up on sleep later. And you’ll be so grateful you went and lived and didn’t let the hard parts stop you from the beautiful ones.

You Can Do Hard Things:

The day after we hiked out, we headed to a birthday party for one of the kids’ close friends. There, I got to chatting with a woman who shared how she’s always wanted to try backpacking with her family. That opened up a conversation about how she’s a teacher, has a beautiful family cabin less than three hours away, and has dreamed of taking her kids there in the summer—but has always been too nervous to go alone.

I was shocked. Not in a judgmental or mean way, but just truly surprised that something like a solo drive with her (not-so-young) kids to a familiar, safe place was holding her back. My heart hurt for her. I immediately wanted to pull out my planner and set a date to go with her and show her: you’ve got this.

Because yes, it’s hard. Traveling solo with kids in tow is a challenge. But it’s also so worth it. And guess what? You can do hard things. Truly. Most of the time, you can figure it out as you go. You don’t need to have every step mapped perfectly. You just need to start.

I recently heard a podcast that offered two gems I can’t stop thinking about:

  1. Just because it’s hard doesn’t mean you’re bad at it.
    New things are supposed to feel uncomfortable and awkward. That doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re learning and growing. Keep going, and it will get easier.
  2. Ask yourself, “What could go right?”
    We’re so good at running through all the worst-case scenarios. But what if, instead, you made a list of what could go well? One family’s favorite quote was:“Mentally play with the idea of complete and inevitable success.”
    It’s not about guaranteeing success. It’s about allowing yourself to imagine what’s possible—without getting paralyzed by the fear of failure OR the fear of success. When you play with the idea of things going well, you loosen the grip of fear and open the door to action.

So, just like I said earlier—you won’t know unless you go. Try it. Say yes to the hard thing. Even if it doesn’t go perfectly, it might still be more rewarding than doing nothing at all.

When Lightning Strikes:

We may have lucked out on our family backpacking trip—sneaking in after one storm and out before the next—but that wasn’t the case on our anniversary trip. Tony and I set off on a 4-day backpacking adventure into a remote, unfamiliar part of Idaho, and it was amazing. I was so excited, but also a little nervous. It was fire season. There was spotty service. And the forecast? A casual 50% chance of thunderstorms.

But we weren’t going to cancel a rare 4-day trip over maybe weather. We’d go for it and deal with whatever came.

Thankfully, luck was still on our side during the day. We finished our hikes before the rain came—though I did end up cooking dinner under a tree in a full downpour after an 11-hour day of hiking (not ideal, but survivable). At least it wasn’t raining when we were exposed at 10,000 feet.

That night though—whew. At 2 a.m., we were jolted awake by the slow rumble of thunder, and for the next 45 minutes the sky lit up with one of the biggest, wildest storms I’ve ever witnessed. It was loud, bright, and terrifying.

There we were: middle of the night, middle of nowhere, in fire season, with lightning cracking all around our little lake basin. My brain went wild:
What if lightning strikes us?
What if it starts a fire?
How fast do wildfires travel?
What if a rockslide starts?
What if a tree falls on us?

And my body? Fully betrayed me. I was shaking uncontrollably, like a terrified dog who can’t stop trembling—fully alert, adrenaline pumping. Meanwhile, Tony was just… enjoying the show.  

We obviously survived the night just fine. But the next morning, I was a little mad at myself. We had this rare opportunity to be completely immersed in a thunderstorm—something wild and intense and real—and I let fear steal that from me. I spent those 45 minutes spiraling in worry instead of surrendering to awe.

I’d just read a passage in The Daily Stoic about this exact thing. About how we ruin the present moment by ruminating on what might go wrong. We double our suffering—first in worry, then (maybe) in reality. Instead, we should choose to experience the now, and let the future unfold when it arrives.

So yeah, Silly Kelli. But also, another lesson in letting go of what you can’t control… and leaning into the moment, even when lightning strikes.

Changing Your Situations When You Can:

Even though I said I regretted how freaked out I was during that thunderstorm, I wasn’t exactly eager to relive the experience.

So, when Sunday rolled around—the final night of our anniversary backpacking trip—and we saw rain and more thunderstorms in the forecast, I had a choice. The hike that day was short, and we had planned to get back to camp early for a chill day. I had my heart set on laying in the hammock with a great book, playing a little cribbage (and obviously crushing Tony ;)), and just soaking up one last peaceful afternoon in the mountains.

But the thought of another cold downpour, getting stuck in a tiny tent for hours, and another possible thunderstorm… nope. That didn’t sound like a relaxing finale. Add in the fact that Monday was going to be a beast: a 4-hour hike out, a 7-hour drive, and all the chaos of packing up. So, we pivoted.

We decided to pack up camp and hike out Sunday afternoon, even if it meant hiking in the rain. It felt like the smarter choice.

Turns out? It didn’t rain. It was beautiful. And I found myself slightly kicking myself for leaving that stunning mountain lake and missing my final hammock/book/cribbage moment.

I almost let myself believe I had ruined the end of our trip…
Or so I thought. 

Pivoting Can Be the Right Call Though:

Since it was our 15-year wedding anniversary, we decided to splurge and stay in a hotel for a night. I figured we’d find something around $100–$150 in Stanley on a Sunday night. But nope. Everything we found was $300+. And I was cranky. I’m a cheapskate at heart, okay?

So I told Tony that even though we’d be arriving late, I didn’t want to spend that much—we could just set up our tent again. Thankfully, Tony gently talked me out of that plan. And then… jackpot! When he went to book the room, the front desk gal mentioned they had one last room for just $200. WINNER WINNER! I was so stoked. And let me tell you—after four days in the backcountry, that hot shower? 100% worth it.

But the night kept getting better.

We were starving. It was 8:30 p.m. in a small mountain town on a Sunday. You know what that means?—everything’s either closed or closing. We were this close to heating up freeze-dried meals in our fancy cabin but we decided to do a quick drive to town to see if anything was open. 

At the last second, we spotted the Sawtooth Hotel & Restaurant still serving, so we pulled in and they agreed to seat us. But of course, I sat down, looked at the menu, and panicked again. Plates were $30+ each. Fancy. Pricey. Not my vibe. (Someone, please teach me how to be okay spending money on fancy things. )

But then, Harry happened.

Our new Australian Shepherd—who we inherited from Gina—is basically famous everywhere we go. Everyone LOVES Harry. Sure enough, this sweet family came over to pet him, then stayed and chatted with us for ten minutes. We told them it was our anniversary and that we’d been backpacking to celebrate, and tonight we were splurging a little.

They were in awe that we thought hiking around the wilderness for four days was fun, but also kind of impressed. We all smiled and moved on with our evening.

And then… 30 minutes later… they came back.

To say goodbye. And to tell us—dinner was on them.

They wanted to treat us for our anniversary. I’m literally tearing up just writing this. It was one of the kindest, most unexpected acts of generosity I’ve experienced. And yes, we joked that Harry scored us a free dinner—or maybe Gina was watching from heaven, pulling some strings. ❤️

The Takeaway

So yeah… long story, but I just wanted to say—pivoting your plans can be pretty amazing too. I let fear nudge us to leave the backcountry early. But that pivot? It was exactly what we needed.

On Monday, we had a slow morning in our cozy cabin. We eased into our day. We journeyed home with time to spare. And we weren’t frazzled or exhausted rolling into the week ahead.

So next time life—or your adventure—throws you a curveball, don’t be afraid to make a new plan. You never know what magic might be waiting on the other side. Just don’t let fear completely derail your experience. You can work through the “what ifs.” And maybe, just maybe, you’ll end up with a  bucket list trip achieved, followed by a hot shower, a surprise celebration dinner… and a reminder that everything works out.

So… what’s on your list?

What’s that thing you’ve been wanting to do that feels a little scary, risky, or brand new? I’d love to hear it! Seriously—send it my way. I’ll happily offer encouragement, tips, or maybe even a story from my own “what was I thinking?!” files to help inspire you to go for it.

Because I promise—you’ll be glad you did.

As always, thanks for reading along. I hope you find a way to chase your own version of adventure, whether it’s bold and wild or slow and simple. I’ll be cheering you on from the sidelines… or maybe even right beside you. (Just no lightning, please :))

–Kelli

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month:
2nd Family Backpacker- and the kids’ determination to make it to this lake when we wanted to turn them back! 

I wasn’t sure I should share this…

But maybe it’s the reminder we all need- to love, to speak up, to Live Life.

“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”  -A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh

Recently, my kiddos were making jewelry with my mom when Jackson picked up a charm and asked, “What does this one say?” It read, Live Life and without missing a beat, he said, “I want this one for Nonna.” Nonna—who, eight weeks ago, passed away after nearly two years of fighting cancer.

It was the sweetest, most caring gesture… and also heart-wrenching. My blunt, to-the-point 7-year-old daughter gently reminded him, “You can’t give it to Nonna… remember, she’s not here anymore?” Jackson paused for a second and said, “I want to put it with her ashes when we spread them.” Even typing that brings tears to my eyes.

And for the past 24 hours, I’ve been thinking about it. About life (as always), and death, and Jackson’s simple wish—to give a charm that says Live Life to someone who’s no longer here. It’s a stark and powerful reminder for the rest of us—those still here, still breathing, still able—to actually live.

Regrets, Even With Time to Prepare

We had 19 months—from diagnosis to death. Nineteen months to cram in what we felt was truly important in someone’s final chapter of life.

Of course, we had no idea we’d only get 19 months. Sometimes it felt like we only had a few. Other times, we believed we might still have years. Cancer is a brutal, unpredictable rollercoaster. But we did what we could to maximize the time we had, just in case.

That said—let’s be real—it’s incredibly hard to live every single day like it’s your last. I know, I know… that’s what I preach in this Elevate Livin’ Life newsletter. I believe in it with my whole heart. But even so, I’ve come to accept that you can’t always live like you’re dying.

Why? Because most days… you’re not. You still have to go to work. Do the laundry. Pay the bills. Prep the meals. Keep up with life. And that’s what happened with Gina too. We knew we should be having all the deep conversations. We knew we should be taking more trips, spending slower time together, painting, laughing, dreaming. But we were still living life—trying to pace ourselves, trying to keep going, in case we had more time than expected. And now, of course, we look back and wish we had taken that trip to see the Chicago Bears play in the fall. We wish we had stopped running around like crazy and just sat still together. We wish we had read her life journal with her, asked more questions, listened longer because when we read it now, there’s more to these stories that aren’t written in the pages and we’ll never know them.

I don’t know the perfect answer. I still believe in living like it’s your last day—but I’ve learned you also have to survive the day-to-day. So, maybe it’s not about living every day like it’s your last, but instead making sure your days aren’t completely void of the things that would matter most if it was.

Here are a few thoughts I’ve landed on—my working list of “try-this-instead” wisdom:

  • Be brave enough to have the hard conversations. (More on that below.)
  • Don’t wait. Say yes to at least one bucket list trip a year or thing you’ve always wanted to do. Stop playing the “someday-maybe” game.
  • Blend your days. Fit in the mundane (because life), but make sure there’s at least one little soul-filling thing in the mix every day.
  • Be your own assistant the night before. Prep yourself for a smoother, more intentional day.
  • Front-load joy. Tackle the fun or meaningful stuff first—it’s easier to push it aside than the dishes.
  • Time block—and protect the s* out of it. If something matters, make space for it like it’s your job.
  • Ask the questions now. Don’t wait for a better moment—if something is on your mind now, speak up before it’s too late. 
  • Make space for slowness. Not every moment has to be epic. A quiet coffee on the porch or folding laundry together while chatting can be just as sacred.
  • Drop the guilt. You can’t do it all, and you’re not supposed to. Try to focus more on presence than perfection.

Handling the Last Time of Doing What You Love
In early May, we took Gina to see her horse, Cocoa—her loyal companion that she visited weekly but hadn’t ridden in a long time. That day, though, she felt strong enough to get up on that horse and take a few laps around the barn. I’ll never forget the look on her face: pure joy, pride, and peace. We all knew it would probably be the last time she’d ever ride. And how do you even begin to cope with that? Both as the person doing the thing for the last time, and as someone witnessing it?

I think about this sometimes during my workouts at CrossFit—when I’m lifting heavy or grinding through a benchmark workout. I wonder: will this be the strongest I’ll ever be? Will I always be a little slower from here on out? When will my last bike ride be? When will I no longer be able to pedal up a mountain and gleefully fly down the other side? When will I hike for the last time from dawn to dusk, exploring some wild new place? Hopefully not for many decades—but truthfully, we never know. So… do we rush to do more of them now? Well, that’s a loaded question for another day.

Back to that morning at the barn—Gina handled it with grace, joy, and tears. She hugged Cocoa and cried. She smiled so big it made us all cry too. It was beautiful. It was heartbreaking. It was honest. That’s the thing about life—you take the highs with the lows and just keep showing up, trying your best to soak it all in as you go.

And of course, having a 5-year-old allergic to horses added to the mood. Jackson has never ridden Cocoa because even being near her usually gives him hives. But that morning, we let him hop up and be part of this special memory, even knowing what was coming. And just look at his face—pure happiness and stoke level of 10… followed shortly by a puffy red face and watery eyes. Totally worth it.

Going Out with a Bang
Even though Gina had stage 4 cancer and we knew we were nearing the end of our treatment options, her oncologist believed we still had one or two lines of defense left. In May, we scheduled the next step: radiation to the brain, set to begin June 11th. She was feeling good—really good—and truly living in those final weeks.

From that unforgettable early May ride on Cocoa, to a spontaneous bucket list trip we surprised her with (flights to Seattle, a road trip to the Hoh Rainforest, Olympic National Park, and the Tree of Life <–pictured above), to a mini family reunion on June 6th—Gina packed a whole lot of life into her last month. It was bold. It was beautiful. And then—bam—it all changed. So fast.

We went from taking a mellow nature walk in McCall with her on Sunday, June 1st… to needing a walker by Thursday… to doing our best to enjoy the reunion that weekend while watching her body rapidly shut down. By Monday, June 9th, she was in a wheelchair, and we were sitting in the oncologist’s office trying to figure out what was happening. Her team was baffled. They were sure something else—like an infection—had to be causing the sudden decline. But after tests, the answer was clear: it was the cancer. And this was it.
I’m not particularly religious, but I can’t help but wonder if her parents—both long gone—were up there in Heaven pulling some strings to make her transition quicker, easier, less painful. Because as hard and shocking as it was to go from hopeful treatment to hospice in the span of a week, we also saw it as a blessing. She lived fiercely to the end, and she didn’t suffer long. That was a gift. Gosh, that made me tear up again typing those words. 

Death Isn’t as Scary as I Thought

Dying wasn’t what I expected. I’ll be honest—I had never seen someone die before, and I was nervous. For months, we talked about where it might happen and who would be there. In my mind, I pictured us sitting quietly around her, holding hands, crying together in the final hours or days. And while moments like that certainly happened, there was so much more to it.

There was laughter. There was even joy. There were games—because we’re a card-playing family—and we made sure to set up around Gina so she could still be part of the action. There were walks with the dogs. Workouts. Errands. Life, in all its ordinary beauty, kept moving alongside the grief.

And there were also the tears, the long hugs, the deep conversations, and the storytelling. So much storytelling. I’m endlessly grateful I was brave enough to go be there—to join Tony and his aunts and uncles for those final days. It wasn’t easy, but it was a gift I’ll never forget.

So if someone you know is dying, and you’re scared or unsure whether to show up: go. Don’t be afraid to be there. It won’t be perfect. It won’t be clean. But it will be real. And you won’t regret it.

Saying Goodbye

How do you say goodbye to someone when you know—like, really know—it’s the last time you’ll ever see them? Let me tell you, that s*** is real. It’s raw. And it’s so uncomfortable. Honestly, I almost didn’t do it. Saying an official goodbye felt too vulnerable, too intense, too awkward.

But I had a boost from my husband, who sat down with me to do it too. We cried. We made promises. We hugged. And even though Gina had been mostly unresponsive for days, she made it very clear she could hear every word we were saying. Even just typing that brings the tears back. It was one of the most emotionally intense things I’ve ever experienced—but also one of the most beautiful.

I’m so, so grateful I was brave enough to speak out loud what she meant to me.

So here’s my message to you: if someone you love is dying, and you feel even a little tug in your heart to say something—do it. Be brave. Say the things. Even if it’s just a text or a note someone can read to them. Or just holding their hand if the words are too hard to speak, it will mean more than you know—to them and to you.

Honestly, I felt the pictures above and these few topics were too personal to share and I debated over and over again about changing them out for different “nicer” photos, or removing this section completely. But I kept thinking about if I had read something like this months ago, it would have helped me prepare and be not so scared to be apart of the end, and also know how important it would be. So I’m laying it all out there for you, one of you out there reading this message who might be preparing for the death of a loved one. Be vulnerable yet be in the moment and be there, you won’t regret it.

Jackson’s Wish to Live Life

After I found some peace with my goodbye to Gina, it was time to return to life and parenting. I headed home while Tony stayed with his family to be with Gina until the end. Even though hospice told us she’d likely pass within 24–48 hours, Gina held on for another five days. In the end, it was just her babies—Tony and Becca—by her side during those final days. They cared for her, loved her, and were with her when she passed away on June 20th, 2025.

Now, almost eight weeks later, we’re still riding the waves of life—especially after losing someone so close. We think about her often, we talk about her, and we feel the grief show up in both expected and unexpected ways. It’s hard, especially with younger kiddos who are still trying to understand it all. But even in the heaviness, there’s beauty—like Jackson’s comment about wanting to leave the “Live Life” necklace when we spread Gina’s ashes.

So now I will be making one of those necklaces. Because it’s a powerful reminder to live this one life we’ve been given.

Whatever you feel called to do—do it.
Whatever you need to support your life—go get that too.
Whatever you’ve been dreaming about—make space for it.

Forget the idea of perfect balance. Just find ways to weave a little bit of it all into your everyday life. A bit of what fuels your soul, alongside what simply must get done. Don’t wait. Don’t tell yourself you’ll start living after you retire—because, heartbreakingly, not everyone gets to retire.

Book the trip.
Start the course you’ve always wanted to take.
Leave the laundry and the dishes for a minute and go lay in a hammock with your kids.

Take a little time, in between all the to-dos, to truly LIVE LIFE.

As always, thanks for reading along. There’s a lot of deeply personal stuff in this one—things I wasn’t sure were appropriate to share—but, well, I’m quite the open book (if you couldn’t tell 😊). And more importantly, I believe this is the kind of thing that should be shared.

Because if I had read something like this months ago, I think it would have helped me. Helped me see the importance of finding the courage to have the hard conversations. To not be afraid of being around death. To still find ways to Live Life in the midst of all the chaos.

So if this helps even one of you do the same—find your courage, face something hard, or simply remember to embrace life—then I will gladly keep sharing these raw and real moments.

Here’s to Elevate Livin’ Life.
– Kelli

Favorite Livin’ Life Activity This Month: Backpacking in Idaho in a New to Us Area – It was AMAZING!!!