Does Your Life Run You or Do You Run Your Life? 

“Freedom is a Mindset, not a Destination.”

-Denise Gosnell

Summer is winding down and I want you to take a serious look at the past few months and think to yourself, did you spend the summer THRIVING or just SURVIVING? From the kids out of school, to your business/work, to travel, to house projects, how did this summer go?  

The Grind of Life: 
Most of the business owners I know started their businesses for one of three reasons; to have a flexible schedule, to make money, and/or to have a business that provides a needed service. I feel like a problem with entrepreneurship though is the mentality to grind, grind, grind, to work harder, not smarter. To work long hours and if you aren’t working long hours, to feel guilty about it. 

Even if someone got into their industry to have that flexible schedule, they get pulled into more work and/or see others grinding so they start grinding day in and day out and lose focus on what they ultimately got into this career for. And hey, I will admit, I love the grind at times too. It feels good. It’s like a good hard workout that you chip away at and then at the end you have that runner’s high. So I’m all about the grind….just not at the cost of also livin’ life too. 

So today I want to chat about letting go of the guilt of not grinding, setting yourself up for success in business and life, and how to thrive through it all (with perhaps a little bit of survival sprinkled in at times too). 🙂  

Letting Go of the Guilt:
First, we must shift our mindset about the NEED to grind. Like I said, the grind can be great. It can feel good, it can be a habit, it can be a necessity at times. But when you don’t HAVE to grind, this is when we must let go of the guilt. Truth be told, this is harder than it seems. I built up my business last year to a point where I had a lot more freedom than I ever had. I had amazing gals on the team that handled the day to day and I worked on the business, not in the business. These tasks weren’t as time sensitive which I loved because I could choose what hours I worked, which typically were early mornings so that I had the rest of the day to play with my kiddos.  

But here’s the thing, I had a lot of guilt. I was hesitant to share on social media when I was out on a hike in the middle of the day with my kids. I worried my agents who hire Elevate TC Services would think I was slacking off, being lazy, dropping the ball (which all of these things were so not true because I had a team to ensure the ball was not dropped and I’d already put in hours of work that no one saw). During this time I realized, it’s time for me to let go of the guilt (still working on this) and start sharing and encouraging others to live this way.  We as a culture have been brought up that working long hours is the right way to run a business, or to be successful in our careers. But STOP. Just stop thinking that and think about how we all as humans might be better off if we adopt a better mindset.

So, together, we need to take notice of those making waves in their career while at the same time are off surfing real waves in the ocean on vacations multiple times a year. Stop and take notice of the successful lawyer who shows up to everyone of his kids’ soccer games in the middle of the day. Stop and don’t think to your self, why are there so many people out on the road at 10 am on a Tuesday and instead think, these people have hopefully built lives worth living and not just working.

How we Spend Our Days, is of Course How we Spend our Lives: 
I have always loved this quote because it’s such a good reminder that what you do today, tomorrow and the next day is making up your life. Last year was magical with having the right leveraging in place to really have the freedom of my schedule. This year I have lost one of those gals and I’m back in the “trenches” a little. It is fun and I did miss it but most of my days are spent in the office and taking vacations is challenging. I don’t want to look back on 2023 and my memories be of just sitting in an office all day. So to combat that, despite being in the trenches of my business I have been doing the following:

• Vacations:
  • Book your vacations and make them nonrefundable. From nonrefundable expenses to making plans with friends you won’t allow yourself to bail on, this holds yourself accountable to making these vacations happen. It’s a little risky but I believe your life and work will figure itself out if you are forced to figure it out. 
• Micro-Adventures
  • I talked about this in the last Elevate Livin’ Life E-newsletter a lot, but sprinkle in some micro-adventures into your life. Small and achievable adventures you normally wouldn’t do in your day-to-day life.
    • Again, commit to people you won’t bail on because you will probably bail on yourself. 
    • Plan these for early morning, either before work starts or a few hours after you get some work done for the day. 
• Freedom Days:
  • I just finished a great audiobook called The Vacation Effect by Denise Gosnell and her theory is, you know how much work you get done right before a vacation? Well what if we build out that efficiency in our lives so that we work three-day work weeks that are insanely productive. Then you have two days a week that are your “Freedom Days”.  She says a freedom day is a BUSINESS day that you do no business on and only focus on your activities that bring you joy. She went from running three businesses and working 70+ hours a week to taking every Tuesday/Thursday off of work for her Freedom days. She still has those three businesses, makes more money/growth from them, and works significantly less. Her book breaks down how to go about doing this but the biggest mindset here is:
    • Parkinson’s Law. If you notice when you are getting ready for vacation you can get a weeks worth of work done in a few days? Well, it’s the same idea, whatever amount of time you allow for a task, project, business, etc. that activity will expand to take up that amount of time. But if you shorten the amount of time allowed for it then you’ll be way more productive and efficient. So, I highly encourage you to go right now and block out some time in your calendar for freedom days. If you can’t do the full day, then at least block out some mornings or three hour blocks during the business day that is your freedom time.
  • This is again may be easier said than done. I tried this out a few weeks ago. I took a Tuesday to go adventure in the backcountry. I was really scared because even though ALL my tasks for the day were done, with real estate there are a lot of unplanned tasks/emails that pop up throughout the business day. Because of this, I did ask my team member to just keep an eye on anything that might pop up that needed immediate attention (nothing did come up) and I just let go (kind of) and had an epic adventure (7000′ feet of elevation gain, one forced swim across a lake, and crying from laughing so hard while being in a delirious state). Yes, this is my idea of fun and the best way to spend a Freedom day. 🙂
    • Anyways, the lesson I learned here is, I almost didn’t go. I almost said “no, it’s a work day, WHAT IF something comes up.” But it was fine! And if I didn’t go I would have been so mad at myself.

Freedom is a Mindset not a Destination:
Don’t say to yourself, well when I’m really successful I’ll retire and have freedom. You may die. Or by that point your kids are grown and have their own lives. Or you’re old and broken. <—- I don’t actually believe that as I feel fitter the older I get but sometimes that is what happens, so I’m just telling you the cold hard possible truth here. 🙂 

So, start tackling those bucket list items NOW. Like Tomorrow! Do not wait.

As you know, I love lists. From bucket lists to to-do lists, to everything in between, I love creating them and I of course LOVEEEEE checking them off. So I’m going to encourage you to make some lists. If you have read along in previous newsletters we had various times we had you create dream lists. Go read through those again. If you don’t have any then take Denise Gosnell’s advice and create your “someday-maybe list”. This is a list of things you have told yourself, when I have more ____ (time, money, etc.) I will do “X”. Well what was that “x”? What was that someday-maybe activity? Create a list of those.

Now every week when you’re analyzing your calendar for the week and you see your freedom day blocked out. Go to these lists and choose what you are going to do with that time. Make it count. And do not allow yourself to work (business, house, whatever) at these times. Remember, true freedom comes from owning a business, not from having a business that owns you. And if you don’t own a business, the same can be said of your work, or your house, kids, life, etc.   

Work Smarter, Not Harder:
Once you have let go of the guilt and time blocked out the time for yourself we hope that the Parkinson’s principle will pan out. You will get all your work done in the other days you have set aside as you’ll work faster and more efficiently. But sometimes that isn’t always the case, so in those instances you may need to start delegating. Go get yourself help! Here are some top ways to do this:

• Hire People:
  • House cleaners, personal assistants, landscapers, etc.
  • Employees or contractors
  • Virtual assistants
  • Cooks
    • You may not want or be able to afford an in-house chef but there are some really great options out there from pre-made food companies that deliver meals to your door, to small business owners in Treasure Valley that bring you dinner. I have a few contacts if you need some! 
  • Hey there! If you are in real estate, you can hire us. 🙂 
• Hire Systems:
  • What systems do you use that you can improve the efficiency for. Research it or PAY someone to research/implement them for you.

Breaking the Rules:
Most of the guilt you have is probably self imposed. I had a family member tell me once that she had this “rule” that they couldn’t go out of town for the weekend unless the house was all cleaned and picked up. She just loved to come home to a clean house after being gone all weekend and getting ready to start the week. And heck, I get that, I agree with that feeling! BUT she realized she was missing out on so many opportunities and/or still doing those opportunities but then killing herself to get out on those weekend adventures that they weren’t even that fun. So some Friday afternoons, she started to say, “forget it, my empty house can sit and be messy and I will deal with you another day so that I can get started on my family weekend of fun.” Yes, it was hard to come home and have work to do, but she was happier to have taken the opportunity of fun and to not stressed herself out before it to make it happen. 

I am so guilty of this too! I started this newsletter and had this goal to do two a month. Then my busy season hit and I had an employee quit so I as picking up all their work right in the midst of the super busy season and I just didn’t have as much time anymore ( especially since my work busy season is also my most favorite time of year and I just can’t not hike and play during it :)). Anyways, I had so much guilt and stress that I was letting my readers down and letting myself down. Then I realized NO one knew about this goal and that sometimes my goals need to be fluid as a new more important temporary goal had popped up- handle my time-sensitive work.

So what “rules” have you set for yourself in life that sometimes you need to break? (This is coming from someone that is the ultimate rule follower too!)

Build Your Life:
“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” – Mae West

Go build that life and once you have it built don’t let guilt get in the way of you enjoying it. Protect your me-time, freedom days, micro-adventures, all of it, so that whether it’s taking naps in the backcountry, sipping margaritas on the beach, playing with your kids, or taking on those passion projects, we hope that you give yourself the space needed to build out something amazing! Something you can look back on and feel like you truly lived and thrived, not just survived and worked. 

Lastly, please, share with me! I love to hear if this sort of stuff speaks to you and helps you build out your life you are stoked on livin’!